I need you so does lieutenant and his bratty friend
by Izzah Hussain
Summary: When feelings blossom they leave devastating turmoil in their wake, challenging all one has ever held on to. The only sane way is to conquer what you crave for... Bleach fanfiction. This is my favorite anime!
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, now before you all start ranting, let me tell you this is fan fiction. Anything can happen here. Plus, I simply like the whole idea. The title makes the content obvious. Don't like it? Don't read it. I didn't force anybody. Just don't post comments saying _nothing_ constructive or helpful. Anyways, to those who came here to enjoy the story, here you go!**

Byakuya's POV

A soft breeze blew by me, making me aware of the close approaching storm. I was still in my office, watching my _sister_ smack my lieutenant's head. He turned to her and growled. She simply crossed her arms over her chest decisively. The red-haired idiot's annoyed expression turned into a full scowl. Which instantly made the image of the other idiot, the orange-haired one, flash in my mind. But even so I could detect and ever so small smile on his lips as his eyes softened when she started walking away. He rubbed the back of his head, where she had to jump to hit him and started following her. I noticed how many eyes her petite form drew to her as she walked past the crowds, her face emotionless and her head held high, an ideal epitome of Kuchiki perfection. But not all of them were eyes I would allow to fall on her. Renji glared at a certain group of youths who couldn't keep their eyes away from her. His reaitsu flared. The youths withdrew to some shadowy corner and I knew they were cowering in fear now. He fixed his eyes back on her progressive form possessively. They were soon out of my sight. I silently wondered if I could ever do the same.

She was so similar to Hisana, yet completely different. Her eyes were brighter. Her gait was more assured. Her smiles were more vibrant. She was harder to break. When I thought about what she had been through I marveled at how she could still keep a smile. She had lived a life of utter misery, paying for sins she never committed. And exactly when it had started to get better I came along to devastate her existence. I had seen the look on her face. It was like she had left a part of her behind. That part was Renji. I knew he sent her with me for her good. He wanted her to have the best. But he had hurt her in the process.

And then, instead of protecting her like I was supposed to, I pit her in a life of stuck up nobles, who unlike normally deceptive ones, wouldn't even try to fake a smile. She was trained and molded into a completely different shell than the one she came from. She used to be a care free spirit. She had seen her way through a lot but she always maintained her perky spirit. I was always so cold to her. Never even showed acknowledgement. I remember the small talk she used to try to make when she first came, trying to know her new _brother_. All she got in response was icy silence. The look on her face when I got up from the table each day without saying a single word still stuck in my mind.

And then, in a desperate attempt to push her further away, I told her that day that I had only brought her in because it was the last wish of my dead wife. Her sister. I expected her to storm out, never look back, cry, scream, do anything that would prove her displeasure. Instead, she stayed by me. And that was when I realized that after being pushed and pulled through the worst of life's hardships, she didn't expect anything better. She accepted the fact that I was providing for her only because of her sister as easily as anything.

Was that the reason? No.

When I found out where she was, I thought it was going to be easy. I would adopt her and give her all that she wanted. She would have a luxurious life. I would make up for all she had missed in Rukongai. What I didn't expect was to find a mini replica of my Hisana. For a moment I actually thought I had got my wife back.

I was scared. Scared of the outcome of the effect she had on me. It was like I was going down a pit with no light, stumbling around, knowing it was dangerous but not admitting the same. I knew the feeling and I thought shutting her out would help. But I should have known better. Every human being craves for that which he can not have. And Rukia was one such craving.

When Ichigo saved her while I couldn't, I finally embraced the fact that I was only making things worse. I couldn't get her out of my mind. I wanted her more with every beat of my heart. Her perseverance was unimaginable. Yet her face always glowed. Rukia could be a well-mannered, beautiful girl like Hisana, but Rukia was something Hisana could never be.

Yes. I loved my dead wife's sister more than I ever loved her. And I seemed to fall harder every minute.

I was going to make up for all the hurt now.

But then...it seemed impossible. There were three big problems between us. Elders, Renji and Ichigo. And that was saying when you considered her as all over me like I was for her. Which, after seeing how I behaved to her, was highly improbable. She might as well hate me.

To me, even that seemed impossible.

*TIME SKIP*

A knock on the dining room door and a young maid came in. I was surprised to see Yuki here. She was Rukia's personal assistant. I remembered how Rukia seemed to think she didn't need one. Obviously, she did now. The black haired girl bowed in front of me. When I cued her to start speaking, the words that came out of her mouth were the exact ones I never wished to hear. "Excuse my interruption Kuchiki-sama, but Rukia-san is nowhere to be found."

I could barely keep my emotionless mask up. Where had she gone _now?_

*TIME SKIP*

I flash stepped from roof to roof as I felt the cold raindrops soak my captain's haori. The sky was literally tearing up today. Thunder roared overhead as I went down the most isolated lanes. I was incredibly close to crying now. Where was she? Did she leave me too? The last time she disappeared didn't go well. I was hyperventilating as lightning flashed once again. The thunderous cry of rain and the gurgle of clouds bounced off the walls and came right back to drum on my ears. I looked around frantically. It had been two hours and a half now. There was no sign of her anywhere. I had checked with all her friends but she wasn't there. I had even gone to her squad. When I reached Renji I found Ichigo there with him too, both slightly tipsy. It was slightly relieving to see them spring up alert the moment they heard of her disappearance. It felt nice to know someone would keep her safe when I wasn't around for her. They were both searching for her right now as well.

Who was I fooling? It was always those two. I never was around for her.

A chill ran down my spine. What should I do? I couldn't think. The only sensible thought that my mind registered was that I had lost her as well.

I turned in another abandoned looking alley. When someone went looking for them, it was amazing how many popped out. I threw all my spiritual pressure out trying to detect even the smallest flicker. Nothing. I jumped up on another roof and shunpo-ed away. I don't remember how many more alleys I checked. I don't remember when my eyes began to tear up. I don't remember when the storm got wilder. All I knew was she wasn't with me. And she was nowhere safe. At some point I crossed a frantic looking Renji, who stopped for only long enough to ask if I had found her when it was obvious I hadn't. But I knew why. It was that silent reassurance. That he wasn't alone. That there were others who were willing to risk the same for her as him. And most importantly the hope that we might find her.

 _'It is okay, master. We will find her. Please do not worry.'_ Senbonzakura's voice was concerned and pacifying. Honestly, it was only his presence at the back of my mind that kept me warm as the cold rain drops cascaded around me. I had no idea what I was going to do if something happened to her. I sincerely regretted every moment that I had wasted in ignoring her when I could have held her close and told her how she was more important to me than air itself.

A flicker. A thunderclap. A scared scream. A pair of widening grey eyes. A shunpo laced step. A shack. A beaten down door. A loud thud and the small creak of hinges protesting.

And there I saw her, huddled in a corner, her raven hair slick with rainwater and glowing purple orbs wide with fear. I stepped in.

"Rukia."

Rukia's POV

My head snapped up at my name. And I saw Byakuya Nii-sama standing in the doorway. I felt my lower lip shiver and this time it was not because of the cold. He was drenched and his beautiful mane of raven hair, just the slightest bit out of place. His breath escaped in low hitches and his usually emotionless eyes were wide with concern and relief. But I was willing to believe the part about the eyes was my imagination for his face was still as stoic as always.

Another huge thunder clap rang and I yelped. I couldn't help it and crawled under the high wooden table. I pulled my knees up to my chest as the cold made me shiver uncontrollably. I was returning home after I had a fight with Renji. It was his stupid boy pride. I had turned into an abandoned alley as I was suddenly seized by an inexplicable urge to cry. I knew why though. I was just a burden to him. He made it clear when he pushed me towards the 'rich noble with a captain's coat'. He was the only one I had left. The only one I actually trusted. But I was nothing to him. He got rid of me the first chance he got. And then just like that, he marches right back into my life with his hand in his hair as if nothing ever happened. And strangely, I still wanted to be with him. I wanted him to stay and make me feel loved again. Like he had. Its the helpless urge of the soul. It keeps on wanting to go back to what was there, physically, and pleased you. He was my only hope of love. Till Ichigo came along.

I lost track of time. I didn't even recognize when the rain drops started coming along. They simply blended with my tears. What shook me from my dampened reverie was a loud thunderclap. I never was afraid of storms during my days in Rukongai. But I was now. Back then when I was just a fragile hag on the streets, thunder never scared me. Now that I was a trained Soul Reaper, it did. Because it reminded me of the streets and my numerous friends who had died on such nights. I was in this tumble down shack before I knew. And I screamed every time I heard the thunder outside as memories haunted me.

And now I had gone and screamed like a wimp in front of my brother. Oh, how I just wanted to go get buried.

"Rukia." The voice had softened. It was almost concerned. His steps were soundless but I could detect some shuffling around. I was surprised to see his stormy grey eyes peaking at me from under the table as he crouched on the other side. His face as usual betrayed no expression. He extended a hand towards me. I could feel my cheeks burning with embarrassment. I must have looked like a big coward. I wanted to scream and swat his hand away and retreat further into the shadows. But I couldn't have possibly done that. I gazed from his hand to his face and back and forth. He remained motionless. Calm. I finally reached out and put my hand in his. He pulled me out from under the table, swiftly.

As I was back in plain sight, the thunder roared again. I shrieked and latched on to the thing closest at hand, which happened to be his haori. I buried my face in his chest as I felt hot tears stream down my face. I cried violently and this time I really didn't know why. He hesitated then his arms rounded waist as his left hand started drawing patterns on the small of my back while his right palm stroked my hair. My eyes widened at his actions. Was this really him?!

Wait. Crying violently in his chest and screaming every time thunder roared, was this really me?!

No.

My sobs grew louder as they started to make my whole body shiver violently. I didn't have any idea what was going on. Why I suddenly felt like crying my heart out. And acting like a total wimp. _'Now you know you are not alone.'_ Sode no Shirayuki's voice sounded in my head. My eyes widened in realization. It was the first time. The first time in so long that he had ever shown me any consideration. That he was right here. I couldn't help burying myself further into his clothes as the realization triggered more tears. I felt his hand move from behind my back and grab my chin. He slowly tilted my face up. I was immediately ashamed of my tear stained cheeks. But before I could form another thought...

Byakuya's POV

I leaned down and clasped her lips with mine. I felt her gasp against my mouth. But I pressed further. She tasted like frozen strawberries. It was amazing how one's lips could be chapped and soft at the same time. I continued to kiss her relentlessly. Half of my mind was reeling against it. But the other half was louder, especially with Senbonzakura cheering me on. I couldn't help but think our lips melded along perfectly. It was like they were fitted to each other. I felt her whole body stiffen and immediately pulled back. Only once her intoxicating lips were away from mine did I realize what I had done.

She looked up at me with her innocent eyes wide as saucers. The tears had dried up now, leaving her cheeks a light tint of pink with her lips parted slightly. I had ever before seen her behaving emotionlessly in front of me or looking angry and pissed off around her friends. This was definitely cuter. I scanned her face for any signs of displeasure. There was just plain confusion in her beautiful eyes. For a moment, I wondered if we had somehow managed to strip the right to express her displeasure along with her freedom as well. But when I looked deep, I realized it really was only confusion.

She tilted her head to the side as her eyebrows knit together. "Nii-sama?"

I just couldn't resist and leaned in for another kiss. She didn't stiffen this time but actually shifted to adjust herself properly. I smirked. I don't know what got over me. Usually I would resist from displaying such demeaning expressions but as she tried to kiss me back. Slowly. Hesitantly, I couldn't help it.

She didn't know the first thing about kissing someone. It was obvious I was her first, and her deliberate attempts to please me, only amused me further. She closed her eyes and stopped struggling with her patterns after a while. She just leaned in and let herself be carried. We broke apart for oxygen and confusion was still etched in her eyes as her lips were still parted and her breath caught in small whooshs. She looked at me with an innocence filled face as her eyes gazed into mine. They were not hesitant like they usually were when she looked at me. Rather they asked a question. Till her eyes fell on the doorway, and widened. I turned around in a flash, wondering how I had missed him.

"Ichigo!" , she called after the orange head who was now running away, leaving me crouching and gazing behind her.

What the hell was I thinking?

Why the hell had she kissed me back?

 **I so love those time skips. How did you like it people? Comment your thoughts. I have at least this one story all planned out ahead. And as for the ending I will think of something. Surely? :P ehheh. Anyways, the next chapter will most probably be updated tomorrow. My first story is already pretty ahead so I guess I will concentrate on finishing it. But that doesn't mean I will abandon this one. So to all my lovely friends who read this, I LOVE YOU! Stay unique, stay you, stay awesome. And always remember that every falcon has to go through terrible hardships before it emerges as one of the most deadly birds in the sky realm.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, how are you peeps?! I am back! Okay so I guess I shouldn't talk too much and just do what I am supposed to do but I can't help it. Especially when you consider the fact that my life is a mess at the moment. I want to dig a hole in the ground and get buried. Honestly, all that is keeping me from punching holes through the walls is the fact that I am not supposed to stress my right wrist too much because the bone is misplaced. I shouldn't be writing or typing or weight lifting too much but that is exactly what I do all day long. Apart from punching goons who dare look at my friends that is :P**

Rukia's POV

I ran behind that crazy strawberry with all the strength that I could muster. It was drizzling but overall the thunder had long since died. I turned right on the boulevard. Just where in hell was he?

I had no idea what just happened. Or what was about to happen for that case. I just kept following the traces of his spiritual pressure that still clung to places, indicating he had gone down the same path. I had been running for about fifteen minutes now. Down one alley, across another bridge my footsteps clattered. I had no idea where I was going. I just needed to find him and clear this mess. At this point, I wasn't even worried how many people woke up due to my shouts and heavy footsteps.

I leaned against a wall to regain my breath. His reaitsu flared right behind me, behind the wall. My surroundings surprised me a bit. Ichigo had never been here before. But then, he had a knack for landing in the most abrupt situations.

It was originally supposed to be a square where the 1st Squad's assemblies were to be held. But since it was not being used, it was turned into a community park. It was a neat little piece of land, contoured by some of the tallest trees in Soul Society. A fountain that sent out a sprout of crystal clear water was set in the middle.

I straightened and traipsed to the small wooden gate that allowed entrance into the small patch of greenery. Right in front of me sat the black robed Substitute, by the marble fountain. His orange hair fell in a fringe along the side of his face, hiding his eyes from my view. I tried to conceal my reaitsu as best as I could but he detected it nevertheless. He straightened and scowled. To anyone who didn't know Ichigo Kurosaki, he would look displeased. But I knew better. That was his default expression. It was supposed to express joy, anger, grief, annoyance, boredom and everything. Including hurt. He glared right at me and I could barely help the sigh that was about to escape my lips. By now I was so tired my lungs were dancing in joy due to the level amount of oxygen my air bags now received.

I walked up to him and sat down. Honestly, now that he was in front of me I didn't know what I had come to say in the first place. It had stopped raining. Only the wind howled around us, chilling me to the bone through my soaked uniform. Its roar was the only thing that filled the disturbingly thick silence between us, forced upon our minds by the shattered fantasies of the subconscious. I turned to him, only to find him gazing at me, emotionlessly. I had to admit, he managed it better than even Nii-sama.

"Sorry for disturbing you, Rukia."

"Ichigo, its not what it seems…" He interrupted me with a humorless chuckle.

"Its not what it seems? Oh please, Rukia. There was no mistaking it. And anyway I have no right to find out what it was, either. I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or, on second thought, maybe it was good I saw you. At least now my heart will understand we are not meant to be."

There was no denying the validity of his words. I was kissing him. Right now all I wanted was to somehow go back in time and change all of that. I was aware of my heart breaking into a million little pieces. He finally admits he felt something more than friendship for me only to lock me out. He stood up swiftly from next to me. Even though I had watched him change from a clumsy teenager to one of the strongest Shhinigami in Soul Society, I was surprised by how agile he was. I opened my mouth to say something. Anything. He raised his hands in front of his chest as his trademark scowl returned. "Really, Rukia, you don't need to explain anything to me. And anyway, words can't fill the gaps here, you know. Its just….. I hope that stuck up bastard keeps you good. Its not like I am against incest or anything. So, um…., best of luck." He gave me a thumbs up, then turned on his heel and flash stepped away. My eyes widened at his words.

I had finally managed to lose the only person in my life who actually cared.

I groaned. Even though my heart was breaking inside, I managed to keep my tears at bay. I didn't want to cry. I had no right to. I had known what I was doing when I kissed him. But I really wasn't romantically attracted. He was my brother for god's sake!

The first thing that the Elders taught me was whatever the head of the clan did was right and it was my duty to obey and go along with every plan of his. I honestly, had no idea why he kissed me. After so many years he finally made me feel like he was there. That I wasn't just a fulfilled promise to decorate his conscience with. And then, he just kissed me? I couldn't figure my brother out for the whole of my life, but this was just a bit too much. What was he thinking? Was that even supposed to mean anything?

At the same time a small, overruled part of me liked it and wanted it to happen again. I had always been intimidated by him. And truth be told, I had a small infatuation with him once. But he didn't even acknowledge my presence. It was like I was some kind of a burden to him. Which was exactly what I was, and this I learned when he finally told me why I was there in the first place.

So what happened now?! He had started warming up towards me a bit. It was barely noticeable. He finally started responding to me and would even care to wish good morning or good night. But other than that, there were no signs that _this_ could ever possibly happen.

Why?

Maybe because my resemblance to his dead wife had finally awakened some human part of him. I set my jaw resolutely while my chest was brimming with pain of unshed tears. That must be it. There was no other reason. No other possibility. No matter how much I wanted to believe otherwise, he couldn't be feeling anything for me.

Right?

Renji's POV

"Abarai." I whirled about at the familiar voice of my stoic Captain. His robes were drenched and a bit loose at the front, as if something heavy had clung to it. His hair glimmered with the small droplets of water that still hung on to his silky raven strands.

"Hai, taichou."

"Rukia is in the community park in the abandoned square of Squad 1. Go and see to it that she remains safe. She might not want to return to the Mansion. If so, do not persuade her but do make sure, wherever she is, is a safe place to be in. am I clear?"

His stormy eyes pierced through my emotionless façade and saw the confusion beneath. I replied robotically. He addressed a final glare my way, then turned and shunpoed off. Now, I was totally, utterly and officially confused. But no one could ever understand the mysterious ways of Kuchiki Byakuya. What was I hoping to achieve by staring behind his back?

I gritted my teeth as I stepped out from under the worn out shed I was searching for her in, expecting a strong shower to greet me. But there was nothing. Only wind roared around me, whipping the realization into my face that she had most probably run away because of me. I shouldn't have been so hard on her. It wasn't her fault. Her expression when I asked her to get lost and stop annoying me burned in the back of my head. She was barely able to restrain her grimace as the words she was about to spit out at me drowned in her throat. She turned on her heel and sprinted away. I was about to run behind her, but I knew that would serve no purpose. So I just continued on my way, and reached home to wait for Ichigo.

A part of my rebelled against going behind her as well. Even after I had pushed her out of my life like she didn't matter, I expected her to welcome me with open arms. I expected her to realize it was for her own good, and not because I didn't want her around.

I turned out of the alley and sprinted towards the community park. Even though I had checked it minutes ago, I was still hopeful I would find her there. Mainly because Byakuya said I would.

I could sense her reaitsu within seconds and it was obvious that she was upset. I swung the small metal gate open to find her sitting against the waterfall. She looked up at me with moisture gathering at the corners of her eyes. My appearance flicked off some kind of switch in her for she let go of her amazingly perfect expressionless façade, and cringed further against the cold marble, sobbing as she rocked back and forth.

"Rukia!" I raced to her and knelt in front of her. She looked up at me, her nose red which indicated she had been holding in tears for way too long. The tip of her nose always turned scarlet when she was trying not to cry. Then she covered her face with her hands and succumbed to the spasms the sobs caused to rake her body. I put my arms around her and pulled her into my arms, hiding my face in her raven mane. I had no idea what to do but when we were kids I had realized hugs comforted her more than anything. She stiffened in my embrace and then started fighting against me, pushing my chest away with her small hands. She shifted around and made it impossible for me to keep a grip on her. She pushed me away from her with all her might and arched her back outwards, in a desperate attempt to free herself. I groaned from the effort of keeping her locked in. "You know that is useless, Rukia."

She didn't give up. For one thing, Kuchikis never gave up and she was a perfect example of their perseverance. I finally had to loosen my grip enough to let her go. If I would have simply released her she would have felt like she won her freedom all because I allowed her to. And even though I didn't wish to make her feel like she won, I didn't want to make her feel bad about herself either.

Once she pulled away, she sat back to stare at me, the tears replaced by plain old defiance. I knew why she was acting this way. I _had_ asked her to get lost after all. Now she didn't want me anywhere around her. I knew how difficult the girl could be, and honestly, it amused me to no end.

"You asked me to stop annoying you and I obeyed, now what do you want from me?"

"Do I need to tell you that I didn't mean any of that, Rukia?"

"Oh please! Who are you trying to fool? I know you did. I was just being slow. I didn't get the hint when you pushed me out of your life like trash the first time you did. Thanks for finally telling me so that I won't be bothering you anymore." She started to get up after her small speech. I had kind of guessed how Rukia, or anyone for the matter, would comprehend my reaction to Byakuya's offer of adoption, but some part of me burned to believe she understood why I had done what I had done. Apparently, that part was wrong. I felt my head lower and the red locks that had broken free of the hair band some time earlier tonight, fall around my head as I grabbed her hand and pulled her down smack so that her butt hit the moss covered ground. She cried out in pain and sat straight to glare at me. The glistening look that only unshed tears could give one's eyes was back. I pulled my gaze away from her face as I felt a pang hurt my chest.

"Was that really how you saw it?" On any other occasion I would be extremely ashamed of how my voice was barely above a whisper. She stiffened a bit. "It was only because I was hoping that bastard could give you a life better than any I could ever offer. I thought….. I thought you would be happy and safe within the confines of his place. I only wanted you to have the best, be it from me or from someone else."

I felt my grip on her hand loosen and she jerked away from me. I didn't dare look up for fear that she would see the tears that now threatened to fall. She stood in front of me, confusion lacing through her aura probably waiting for the information to sink in. Finally, she shifted a bit and came to kneel by me. I felt her small hands weave through my thick hair and linger a bit, instantly reminding me of how she loved my hair down. Her delicate yet callused fingers finally reached my tear stained cheeks. Her soft skin felt like heaven against my warm, leathery skin. She pulled my head up to lock gazes with me. I averted her eyes. No way would I be able to face her with tears staining my cheeks. Hell, I didn't even cry when our friends died. How could I now? I was the man. I had to be a pillar.

"You might not know it but I have heard you sniffling at night back in our days in Rukongai, when you thought I was asleep.", she said. Like always, she could read me like a book. Why hadn't she known then, that I would never send her away willingly? She was the one I lived through each day like it was a fight for, never giving up. I parted with her, the only thing I had left, for her. I tore apart all barriers and even fought her brother. All of that, and she always believed I wanted her to go away. She was being incredibly selfish. Another characteristic adorned upon her by the Kuchikis, probably.

"Lets go home.", she said. Just like the old days. When she used to drag me back to the house after a busy day of stealing, begging and doing whatever we had to in order to live. I finally met her eyes, only to find the most beautiful smile ever on her lips. It was so delicate, that it wiped all thoughts off my mind.

I grabbed her and flash stepped away. She screamed at me to stop and that she could do it on her own. I cursed mentally. Her stupid obsession with 'self reliance' was getting to me. I knew she could shunpo, fight Hollows, stand up for herself and do a hell lot more. But why bother when she had me to do all of that for her? I knew that pleased her ego. The small part of her that had always felt unneeded and unwanted was satisfied when she was taking care of matters for herself. But it was obvious she enjoyed it this way, by the giggles that escaped her between shouts. Plus, who wouldn't? Most girls would die for this experience, especially with _me._ But then, Rukia Kuchiki wasn't just some girl. And yes, I was perfectly aware of the fact that most boys would die to have that experience with _her_ in their arms as well. Which was why I was never going to let her go again.

I finally reached my apartment and set her down on the front step. She huffed in annoyance as she tried to smooth her hair down. I held in a chuckle. She was so small yet she believed she could do anything in the world. And was confident about the same.

Not that I was denying it.

I opened the door that I had forgotten to lock and swept my arm up front in what, I hoped, was a good imitation of a flourish. "I welcome the Kuchiki princess into my humble abode." I bowed and she just rolled her eyes and entered. I realized it was the first time I had actually invited her to my house. No wait, even then I hadn't invited her. She had practically invited herself.

The house couldn't be called small, considering only one person lived here, but it was nothing worth flaunting either. The hallway that began at the door ended in a small kitchen with a mahogany dining table with two chairs. To the left was my living/drawing room, with a big expensive TV set and a couch. The walls were decorated with abstract modern art, which I happened to be quite fond of. I knew the setting wasn't up to Japanese standards. But the Soul Society was lagging behind. And it was my house. I could decorate it whichever way I wanted and whoever disliked it would have to deal with it.

Plus, I had confirmed, having a TV or a couch didn't offend the rules of Soul Society. Like having tattoos did.

To the right was a spare room. My guest room. It was sparsely furnished and had only the necessities. Like a futon, a side table, a chair in the corner, though I was not sure if I had put the last item in the room or if it was still in the store room.

A staircase to my left led up to my bedroom and study, the latter of which was filled with books and a desk and was supposed to be used. Like I didn't have enough paperwork at office.

Yes, that was about it.

Rukia gazed at the house in wonder. And I was afraid for her mental health cause she lived in a _palace!_

"What happened?", I asked. "Not up to you?"

"Hmmm?", she asked dreamily as she slowly turned to me. "You know I never really saw that manor as my home. _This_ is what I would call home. A small place I share with someone I love. That thing there, sitting amidst the most beautiful gardens is a show piece, set for decoration and houses soulless infidels."

At that precise moment I realized what a mistake it was to send Rukia away. She never wanted the wealth and luxury that was forced on her. She just wanted a family.

"Come." I grabbed her hand and pulled her up to my bedroom. I threw the door open in a flash and bared the messy room to her. I scrunched my nose. Maybe the guest room was a better idea.

"Um…turn around.", I said but she simply chuckled and moved into the beige painted room. Then, I had to endure an overly bossy Rukia as she pulled together, what was worthy of being called a room from the garbage dumping site my bedroom resembled, for about fifteen minutes. I heaved a sigh of relief when she finally pulled the futon in place. I settled down having changed already and pulled her along with me. But just as I was about to snuggle in the warmth with her familiar physique by me, just like how we did in old days when it was too cold for us to bear, she fainted. I panicked for a moment, but then remembered the rain always did that to her and she would be perfectly fine in the morning. I lowered her sleeping figure into the warm mattress, smiling contently.

She was all mine for tonight.

 **Now that was a pretty big chapter. Just as I had expected it takes less time to update when you are not reading fanfictions side by side. Anyways, I am super tired so I am gonna be taking a nap now, so I can make another chapter in the evening. The next one will be when she finally returns to the Manor. And to Byakuya. How did you find Renji's POV guys? He was really tough to write about especially since, I, think he is a big fool for the way he walks around wearing his highly inflammable pride on his sleeve. I mean, he should just go and tell Rukia about how he feels, right? What is he doing, sitting around and waiting for Ichigo to snatch his girl from him. Though it would be incredibly fun to see his reaction to that :P Anyways, till the time Rukia actually gets involved with one of the three potential suitors we will have to do with fanfictions and fanarts. Though I would love to see Byakuya get more brotherly and concerned towards her I also seem to love the 'forbidden love' knack. Okay then, that's about all that has been running in my head for today. See you later!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello dewdrops! That's what I will be calling you. I don't know why but it just seems right. Anyway, here is chapter no 3. A big thank you to those who added this story to their favorites. I love you! Here take this pie I just made, or the edible part of it that is *hands over virtual pie* Alright, I am going to cut my blabbering now and give you the chapter. Here you go….**

Rukia's POV

The warm pressure of his arm around my waist was a welcome development from my usual lonely nights. I shifted around to make myself more comfortable and became minutely aware of the piercing pain in my abdomen, solar plexus and further down. I groaned and attributed it to the rain. It always seemed to have crazy effects on me. I propped myself closer to his sturdy chest, inhaling his spicy scent.

I was obviously not in the Mansion.

WHAT THE FUCK?! I WASN'T IN THE MANSION!

I scrambled up from the futon waking Renji in the process. He growled and draped his arm over where I had been seconds ago. I grabbed my Shinigami uniform from where I had tossed it on his nightstand after changing into some more comfortable clothes of his last night and rushed to the bathroom down the hallway, screaming "Oh you can sleep all you want! The worst that can happen is Byakuya Nii-sama will kill us both! That is it!"

I stopped midway in what I was doing. Now that I look back, I was changing out of his shirt then. How in heavens was I going to face him? What would I say? What would he say? What would happen? Oh my God!

I quickly stripped off, bathed and changed into my now dry uniform, singing 'Rose Blood' by One Ok Rock, a song I had heard in the human world to keep my mind from wandering off in the unknown for I knew that would only make me procrastinate. I stepped out of the bathroom and rushed back to his room to find my slippers. I was relieved to see the futon folded back, which indicated he was up.

I skipped down the stairs once I found my slippers and managed to put them on, only to find him standing in the kitchen, messing around with pots and pans and spoons and containers. He cursed heavily as he dropped something that made a huge clatter.

"Renji, as much as I would have loved to stay and save your kitchen from the devastation that is on its way, I need to leave because if Nii-sama finds out I am not home I am landing in deep trouble.", I said as I made my way towards the door.

"Relax, Rukia," His gruff voice was loud and unconcerned as he bent to pick up whatever he had dropped. I turned around to face him. "Byakuya knows you are not at the Mansion. Hell, yesterday when he told me that you were in the community park, he also said that if you didn't feel like going back to the Mansion you could go wherever you wanted, so long as you kept out of trouble's way."

I froze a bit at his words. So Nii-sama knew where I was yet he sent Renji to get me. I was overwhelmed by a sudden urge to pull at my hair. What the hell was going on?!

"Are you sure?", I asked. It was just like Renji to get confused about the simplest things of all time.

He turned to face me, scowling. "No, the neighbor's mad dog just came and bit me on his way to loo!"

I rolled my eyes and walked back to the dining table. I propped myself up on a chair. They were quite high so my legs dangled above the ground. I heard him drop and break a few more things but said nothing. "Did he give permission for me to have breakfast out of the Mansion, too?", I wondered. Aloud. Oops shit! I turned in time to see the beginnings of a growl from my red haired best friend.

"Since when did you become a doll for him to command as he wished?", he demanded as he pointed a frying pan my way.

I sighed. I wanted to say, 'Since the day you gave me away.' But I checked myself in time. He had explained to me yesterday why he sent me away. The reasoning was unlikely but just like Renji at the same time. Especially when I remembered all the nights in Rukongai. The times when he gave me whatever small amount of food we had and ran on an empty stomach whole day, starving himself. Or how he would give my blanket, his blanket _and_ his shirt to me just so I kept warm. I sighed. He always did want me to have the best. But that time, he just went too far.

For I would have patiently dealt with the Academy, failed (because it was obvious I was going to), then gone back to the same class or maybe back to the District all so I could stay by him. But no, he had to go and put me out for adoption. Did he really think materialistic pleasures were all I cared about?

I sighed again and watched his back, he had turned back while I was still spacing out. "What are you trying to do, Renji?"

"Breakfast.", he grunted. I chuckled and waited patiently for him, even though in the end all he could pull together a burnt toast with a layer of butter. And upon further enquiry, I figured out he always had breakfast with Madarame-san so he didn't know the first thing about cooking. That only caused more chuckles and screaming, and everyone knows who did what.

I put the plates away and did the washing for him as he sat there grumbling about how cooking wasn't his business. In general, so many complaints would irritate me and cause me to snap but not today, for today I had reunited with my best friend. I was sincerely happy and that was a first in a long time.

That train of thoughts lead me to Ichigo. I shook my head, attempting to shake his expressions, or rather lack of them, from my mind as well. I would talk to him. As soon as I got a chance but for now I couldn't let him ruin the day for me.

We finally exited his apartment after about two arguments about why Soul Society wanted him to cover up his tattoos. They weren't arguments either since we both wanted his tattoos to show but to any onlooker it would look like we were fighting though we were both in favor of the same thing. I smiled softly. That was just how things turned out for us.

We drew more than one curious glance when people saw us coming out of his apartment together but my best friend/body guard addressed them all with his 'special for when Rukia is with me' growl and they all looked away. I marveled silently at how strong he had become. He had achieved the strength he always craved and it just simply felt nice to look up at one of the feared vice captains of Soul Society and be able to claim I have watched him grow from the phase when he would still be dribbling in his sleep to what he was now.

I went off to my office, and yes, just as expected he came to escort me to the very doors. I rolled my eyes at his childish behavior. He acted like any moment now, Aizen would jump out of the shadows, grab me and disappear. I shivered slightly at the possibility and yes, it was a possibility. And it was on everyone's mind.

I sighed as I drew open the doors to my office, and endless stacks of paperwork.

*TIME SKIP*

I stretched my arms over my head and yelped joyfully. Ukitake taichou looked over to me and I flushed lightly. But he did nothing but smile and gesture for me to leave. After wishing him, I slid open the doors. And then the thought crashed on me.

I had to go back to the Mansion.

Byakuya's POV

I waited patiently for her. I had come about fifteen minutes earlier today, just to give myself a better feeling about the whole situation. It did not seem to be working.

Renji had told me she had spent the night at his house. I was momentarily angered by the fact that he could just walk up to me and state that so shamelessly but I concentrated on my work and waited for the anger to drown out of me, which didn't seem to be happening.

The doors opened and Rukia walked in. For the first time in so many years, I felt hesitation. I had no idea how I was going to deal with this. I knew it would most probably be extremely hurtful if I just let it be without uttering a word about what happened last night but deep down I wanted it to be just like that, and the moment I looked at her face, knew she did too.

She said the formal greeting and we began the meal in a silence interrupted only by the dull clang of spoons against plates. The tension in the air was so thick I doubted if it could be cut by the fine blades of Senbonzakura either. The hollowness of the room seemed to magnify it. Anticipation was gnawing at my stomach. I recognized this feeling from long ago in my childhood. It was a strange mixture of curiosity and speculation. Something Ginrei had warned me against. If this _state of mind_ was handled incorrectly, it could lead to devastating results. I looked at the petite, black-haired beauty in front of me.

"Rukia." I closed my eyes.

"Yes Nii-sama?" Her voice was so farfetched I wondered if she was whispering. But I knew, she won't. Not in my presence, at least.

"Did you find Kurosaki yesterday?" As soon as the words left my mouth I knew it was the wrong approach.

"I did, Nii-sama. But I would like to request a permission to visit the human world someday this week, as I need to," I sensed her hesitate. "address some matters of relative importance with him."

I hated how she was all formal and, dare I say, _stiff_ around me. But that was just how we had taught her to be. It was intriguing how we had failed in dampening her original confidence and perkiness while we had broken her enough to make her succumb to a lifestyle that wasn't appreciated or welcomed by her. The powers of _family_ were undeniably strong.

I nodded and we fell into the familiarly uncomfortable silence again. I took a deep breath. I had to address this issue or it could mean risking our relationship. Or what had begun as a bad travesty of it. I braced myself to engage her attention again but she beat me to the chase.

"Nii-sama, about last night,", she let her voice dissolve into steady silence, obviously ignorant as to what she wanted to say.

I basked in the final moments of silence before the time taken to answer could go out of normal. When I finally started speaking, the words that came out of my mouth were the exact ones I shouldn't have said while at the same time appeared to be the easiest way out of this. "You do not have to bother yourself with the occurrence of last night, Rukia. It should not concern you more than necessary and under the present circumstances, I do not deem it necessary in the least. I would suggest you forget it."

 _'_ _Byakuya, you fool, what the hell did you just say?!'_ I was more than startled. Senbonzakura never addressed me in that manner. I opened my eyes to look at her but could only glimpse her silky raven hair. I glanced down at my plate to find it bare of its contents. I was about to get up but a small voice pulled me right back.

"No." I looked at her to find her still burning holes through the wood with her glares. "I can not forget it. I want an answer, Kuchiki taichou. Why did you kiss me?"

I was not sure whether I was pleased by the omission of Nii-sama or hurt by the increased amount of formality between us. My eyes widened slightly at her demand. She had never behaved that way before. It landed a harsh blow to my pride. The edges of my mouth formed an even more straight line, that is if that was possible. "Rukia.", I warned.

"What?!" Her head jolted up. I could see right through the anger boiling in her eyes to all the emotions she was trying to conceal. She glared at me, apparently having forgotten her place and mine. "Am I not even allowed to express my anger over valid subjects in this household?" She stood up and looked inches away from drawing out her zanpakuto. "I refuse to be a toy for your pleasure, Kuchiki Byakuya. I don't care if you cast me out! I am not my sister! Be _generous_ and remember that I am me and I can either be someone you want or someone you choose to leave behind. I am not an object for your temporary pleasure." With that, she turned and marched away, managing to leave me glaring behind her back, stunned into silence, twice within 24 hours.

I glared down at my guiltless plate. Was that how I had made it look? That was not how I had meant it to be. Terrible guilt smote me. Did I make her feel used? Or perhaps unwanted? I didn't know. I didn't want to know.

 _'_ _Your knack for getting into deeper trouble than necessary never ceases to amaze me Byakuya.'_

I had no answer for my zanpakuto. So I thought back the first thing I had in my mind.

 _'_ _Under no circumstances do you get to call me a fool, Senbonzakura.'_

Rukia's POV

I walked through the corridors to my room. I could not believe I had just spoken to Byakuya Nii-sama that way. But honestly speaking I was not the least bit guilty.

It was already hard to restrict all the pain and grief in an inaccessible abyss. He had just layered it with further hurt. What the hell did he mean by 'forget'? Earlier I had thought he kissed me because I reminded him of Hisana, but now I know. That wasn't the case. What had he tried to do? Was I just that, an object to direct his lust or sudden-desires-to-kiss to? I felt another pang hurt my chest. I knew I wasn't anything to him but this was just a bit too much. He just fucking made it clear to me that I was of no importance.

But I refused to be that. I refused to be a use and throw. A disposable. I no longer cared what he thought of me. I was going to abandon the quest to please him. I didn't freaking care anymore. I rested my head against the closed door behind me.

I did not care!

*TIME SKIP*

I tossed and turned on my futon trying desperately to get some sleep, which seemed like some distant possibility to me today. I groaned as I sat up. A calm breeze blew in from the half open gates. The smell of dew-damp leaves wafted up to me from the gardens. I looked at the gates in a trance.

Minutes later, I found myself standing under a cherry blossom tree. The soft undergrowth tickled my feet refreshing my senses. I took a deep breath allowing a small smile to leak through my perfectly practiced Kuchiki façade, reminding myself of the fact that I just didn't care anymore.

"Rukia." His deep voice held the calm before the storm. And it was the only thing that alerted me to the fact that I had strayed in his personal garden.

 **Yay we are another chapter down! And tomorrow is still update story no. 2 day so you might get a bonus incentive. But I have recently published a new story which I have no idea of what I am going to make of it so I might be updating that. Oh, don't worry your pretty little heads with that, dewdrops! I don't even know why I have typed this here but since I broke my backspace in a fit of inexplicable rage and frustration I can not erase that. Sorry! Thank you for giving this a try! I love you! Stay awesome!**

 **MinaBlueGlass: Yes it is indeed a Rukia centric story. She is my favorite character after all! *fangirling* I am straight though XD. Anyways, I agree with you that the stuck up brother is a brother and does not seem to have any emotions for anybody (not just Rukia) in canon. Well I wholeheartedly support the bro-sis arc of those two as well. But this story began as an experiment to venture into the unknown emotional depths of pre-developed characters, so I could add the missing emotionality in my fantasy novel I am currently working on. So I am sorry if it offends you. I am not against incest and honestly, I just like ByaRuki dammit!**


	4. Chapter 4

**So hey guys! I am back XD. When you review I get motivated and update fast lovelies. It is so nice to read what you have in mind. And replying to you of course.**

Rukia's POV

I turned around in a flash, my hand flying to where Sode no Shirayuki's sheath hung on my hip, generally. But thankfully, I had changed so I wasn't able to draw out the sword. I really had no idea why his voice provoked that reaction from me. What was wrong with me? It wasn't like I could fight him even if I had to, which I was praying would never happen, but the instant I heard his voice it triggered my hand to fall back and search for the weapon.

His eyes betrayed no sign that he had registered the movement, but it was obvious he had. Kuchiki Byakuya never missed anything.

I gazed into his stormy grey eyes, an endeavor I had never been able to get right in these past years. I don't know what was fueling me but right now I felt like I could take on Aizen bare handed. Was it my anger? Hurt? Jealousy? Lack of sleep? Or plain adrenaline? I had no idea.

"I am sorry. I did not trespass into your garden deliberately. Looks like sleep has addled my mind.", I took a step back. A way to ask for dismissal.

He just stood there, needless to say, emotionlessly. His hair was free of the kensieken. He was wearing a silk kimono that was obviously his night apparel. I scoffed. He had too much of money and knew how to waste it while millions out there had to go without food everyday. This lifestyle did not make me feel better about myself, it only disgusted me to think that some people had so much while so many out there did not even have the basic necessities.

I looked at him, wondering if he knew what it was to go to sleep empty-stomach for so many nights that it is easier to count the nights that you had had food. I was a bit disoriented as well, by his appearance. Right now, he looked like a….. _human._ Not a spotless brand ambassador of celestial grandeur. Something you are worthy to touch.

"This is your house, Rukia. Taking a stroll won't be called trespassing."

This time I scoffed physically. I knew how _inappropriate_ that was but I just couldn't help it. My house? Some part of me was suffering with a terribly strong urge to grimace at the possibility. I had never known I was harboring such a lot of hate for these Mansion walls but tonight it was like an unknown vault, filled with disgust and horror, was unlocked and allowed to flood my mind. Everything seemed so fake all of a sudden I was pretty sure the next moment I would wake up to the familiar smell of dirty shacks in Renji's arms, out on the streets again. And I won't really mind either.

Except there was one memory I didn't want to leave behind. That idiot Ichigo.

Though I was perfectly aware of the fact that I had most probably lost him already.

"My house? Were it left to me, I would refer to it as a cage."

He gazed at me steadily for about thirty second more then, stepped outside. "It is highly unfortunate you have come to look at this place in such a light." He started walking towards me and I was sure that he could hear my heart thumping like a malfunctioning engine. He passed me and went to sit under the same tree I was admiring minutes ago. He pulled one leg up to his chest and rested his arm on his knee.

He looked so different from his usual impeccable self that now I was sure I was dreaming. His posture was relaxed and his hair tousled enough to make him seem human. Something physically present, and not just a fantasy of the unknown. Then, a miracle happened.

He sighed.

My eyes bulged out till I was afraid they were going to fall out of their sockets. I felt like scratching my hair, but checked myself in time. If I was confused minutes ago, then I was riding a rollercoaster down the road of perplexity now. I felt like running around in circles, flapping my arms screaming 'What the fuck?' but I retained the last amount of my sanity and refrained from doing so.

"Do you not like it here, Rukia?"

I walked over to where he was and sat down next to him, all the while trying to stop my limbs somehow. But they seemed to have a mind of their own. His cherry blossom scent washed over me and I inhaled deeply. "I was under the illusion that I did."

"And what caused those illusions to snap tonight?"

I answered without thinking. "The knowledge that I am unwanted here."

"You might have been so in the past but you aren't anymore. You are more than a fulfilled promise to me, you are someone I want to see every morning after I wake up and that can't be changed by anything now."

I scoffed again. "It seems to me that you have mastered the fine art of lying, Kuchiki taichou."

"That happened about a century ago. But I have to admit, that I have mastered the fine art of registering the burning turmoil of emotions in me and channeling them into one stream so that I can express them now."

I turned to him only to find him gazing serenely at the moon. Before I could respond he asked another question. "Do you like it?"

"What?"

"The moon. Do you like it?"

I thought of my zanpakuto, Sode no Shirayuki and how the crystal clear snow of hers always reminded me of the majesty of the moon. A small smile made its way on my lips.

"I love it."

"Does it bother you, that I do too?"

I turned to him in a flash, the second meaning of his words had not gone unnoticed. His grey eyes betrayed warmth I could not relate with him. They seemed so tender it sent butterflies fluttering in my stomach. He had angled his back so he was sitting against the tree while also being able to look at me. Now I knew I was dreaming. If he didn't look totally breath taking generally, he did, now. I loved how his eyes were flooding with affection. For me.

I didn't register me draw my knees to my chest, but I was glad I had a place to hide my face in. "I don't know.", I whispered in my clothes.

I felt his arms wrap around my waist as he pulled me into his lap. His lips abraded my hair and I was angled so I was breathing in the crisp white of his shirt. He caught my chin and made me look at him. I saw a small pink dart out and lick his thin lips. Slowly, he started leaning down towards me till we were inches away from each other. I felt his lips brush mine, checking if I was alright with it. But my damned mind had gone off its hinges. It just didn't react. It was like he had intoxicated me or something. I leaned up and clasped my mouth around his.

I don't know why but my super-slow mind chose that instance to rush back in time. My eyes opened wide.

This was wrong on so many levels. There was _nothing_ about it that won't be branded as wrong. But then, I wondered why it felt so right…

I closed my eyes and rested my head against his chest as I abandoned all attempts to think. I just let him draw me into the rhythm. I noticed how his lips felt so soft but so tough all the same and seemed to carry the same cherry blossom scent. I inhaled deeply, allowing it to cloud my mind and pull me away from reality.

I felt a strong burning in my lungs and I knew I needed to pull apart. I placed a small hand on his chest and he immediately drew back. He looked at me, in what I can only call a totally to-die-for manner, his lips parted and his breath escaping him in soft draws. Some strands of his hair fell across his face and made him look all the more _good._

I never knew anything other than Chappy could have me fangirling but he certainly did.

I smiled softly as I got up from his lap, my legs suddenly feeling woozy. He stood up, looking nothing like he did moments ago. He was the perfect image of Kuchiki perfection. "I hope you decide soon enough. I have waited for way too long Rukia, to tell you this and I don't think I want to wait any longer for your reply."

He turned and walked off, leaving me staring behind me. I chuckled softly. Whatever happens, our staring games were never going to end.

Ichigo's POV

I looked out of the window, amazed at how the moon managed to remind me, every single time, of that annoying evil monkey midget. I sighed as I felt another pang hurt my chest. Why did she have to make me feel this way? Why did she have to bring me back to life only to push me out of hers? Why?

I wanted to go to Soul Society and tear that bastard's heart out of his chest. He had never even been there for her. Hell, he was her brother but he put her out for execution and actually came to escort her to death. Yet, he managed to steal her from me. What was it? His good looks? His money? His status? Rukia never struck me as a greedy bitch but I couldn't help but think along those lines. What else could it be?

I had no idea what I was going to do now. Dad had noticed how my aura seemed darker and Ishida had actually asked me if something had happened and that was just in about 24 hours. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get that image out of my mind. I grabbed the clock from my nightstand and threw it at the floor, watching it shatter into pieces. This was the seventh thing I had broken and I was nowhere next to done.

I felt like screaming, all to fill the silence. The room was so isolated it bit me in the butt. Her presence lingered everywhere. The closet belonged to her and I could almost see her stuff lying behind the draw. She was a sister to Karin and a daughter to Isshin. She was the world to me.

 _'_ _Ichigo.'_

Zangetsu called from deep within my inner world.

 _'_ What, old man?'

 _'_ _Pull it together, lad. You are acting like a love-struck teenager.'_

'If you look at it the way I am looking at it, that's just what I am.'

 _'_ _You are looking at it the wrong way then.'_

'Do you really think I need that shit right now?'

 _'_ _Yes.'_

I sighed. This wasn't getting over anytime soon.

'Yeah, so, tell me.'

 _'_ _You need to get over her. Its not like you could ever get her.'_

I scowled. 'Why?'

 _'_ _She is a death-Goddess Ichigo, and you are just a human. This was not even a possibility.'_

'Why didn't you tell me that while I was falling for her?'

 _'_ _You realized how you were all over her yesterday itself, Ichigo.'_

I just groaned. 'Look I will try my best, okay? But I don't promise anything.'

Pleased with that, he left my mind alone. And the emptiness was back to torture me. I sighed but did not let my mind wander over to her again. I grabbed my coat. I didn't know what I had in mind but I couldn't stay here any longer.

*TIME SKIP*

I was at the one place I shouldn't be at.

At the house of Inoue.

I knocked on the door, and waited patiently. She was most probably asleep. I cursed my rotten brains. What was I thinking? Minutes later, the door opened to reveal a groggy looking brunette. She was wearing a nightgown and had her hair in a bun.

"Kurosaki-kun?", she yawned softly.

"Eh, Inoue.", I scratched the back of my head. She caught my hand and pulled me inside, letting the door fall back in the frame with a dull thud. She escorted me to the living room where I sat down on a couch.

"Would you like to eat anything?"

My panic switches were immediately turned on, and my hands flew up, palms out, automatically. '"Don't bother. I have had my fill." I stroked my stomach.

"It won't be a bother in the least.", she chirped up and started to bee-line for the kitchen.

"No!", I grabbed her hand. "I came to talk to you not to eat."

Her cheeks colored and I started on my abusive mental rant again. Unlike what people seemed to think, I was perfectly aware of her obsession over me. But it was futile. Or had seemed so. Now, it looked like it was worth it.

She came to sit by me, timidly. Then, she did something totally senseless. She perked up and started sniffing the air around me. Her brows scrunched in confusion and I wondered why.

She sat back and stared at me with a horrified expression on her face. "Kurosaki-kun, you are drunk!", she exclaimed. Oh, man!

"Yeah, well, I…. um, kind of, am." I started rubbing the back of my neck again. It was suddenly so prickly!

I surveyed her form and my breath hitched. Why had I never noticed it before that she was so….sizeable. My eyes lingered where they shouldn't and she started fidgeting a bit. I looked back up to her face. She was so beautiful. I leaned forward and caught hold of her hair clasp, pulling her hair free. I smirked at how she jumped up at my actions. "You are looking good." My voice was not left untouched by the alcohol. I leaned towards her face till we were inches away. My hand came to rest on her thigh and started stroking it softly. She stiffened then sighed and leaned her face forward anticipating the kiss I was about to land. I cupped her cheek and fitted my lips to hers as my fingers started snaking under her skirt.

She moaned and leaned her head back as I forced her down on the couch. My hand left her cheek and tangled in her hair, pulling her head closer to mine. I was about to fall down on her when an image flashed in my mind.

Rukia.

I removed myself from over her, the effect of alcohol undertaken by the drug of love. I grabbed the coat that I had tossed off who knows when and started out of the house. The brunette called for me from behind my back and I turned to find her sitting up on the couch, her brows knitted together in confusion. "Did I do something wrong?" Her face was filled with hurt and grief and she looked incredibly close to tears.

A pang hurt my chest and whatever expression I had been making earlier turned into a grimace. "No, Inoue. It isn't your fault. Its just that… _we_ are wrong."

She looked down at her hands and two tears steadily fell from her eyes. "Is is because of Rukia-san?"

I could hear the sobs quivering her voice and I was at her side immediately. I placed my hands on her knees only to find her skirt already soaked by her tears. I cursed myself, mentally. I knew exactly how she must feel. To have someone you love in the arms of another. And what hurt me worse was the woman I had put her through all this pain was never mine to be.

Tears started springing up to my eyes and in a long, long while, I just didn't care.

"Yes and no." I hung my head, not wanting to let her see the obvious tears.

She glanced up but I did not face her. She grabbed my chin gently and pulled my face up. She rested her forehead against mine, so that the tears that dripped down her eyes flowed down my cheeks, merging with my own.

She didn't need me to explain. She knew perfectly well what I meant. Her eyes were filled with understanding ….and pain. I felt her hand cover my own. "No strings attached, but just for tonight, let me make you forget Kurosaki-kun." With that she closed the distance between us.

 **Done! That incident with Inoue wasn't planned. It just came up. I am sorry for any mistakes you may find. I have been overly cautious but I am sure there are going to be many. :(**

 **JoTerry: Yeah mine does too. Every single time I think of it. But it will get better surely? *sweat drops***


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello everyone! How are you? You know, when I hadn't started writing fics, I always just read the stories and left without even favoriting or following them (as I didn't have an account then) or reviewing. But now as I have started writing myself, I can't tell you how much of a pleasure it is to read the reviews. So I thank you JoTerry for being a constant reviewer. I love you!**

Rukia's POV

"I will be going to the human world tomorrow." I told my red-haired best friend as we walked back to the Mansion. He had grown overly-possessive after the small disappearing stunt I pulled. He would walk me to the Manor every day. That idiot had always been mad. Now he just went a rung lower on the sanity ladder.

"Mission?" he craned his neck above the crowd. I didn't know what always interested him so much, above the heads of everyone else. I sighed. Guess I would never find out.

"Nope. Just a visit." He made an absent-minded sound of 'hmm' . We walked the rest of the way silently, neither having a word to say. Secretly, I had missed those days when we could simply be there, without having a word to say or a reason to give for our appearance together. I looked up at his towering body. I groaned. There actually was a time when our heights were level. I don't know how he sprouted so much while I remained so short.

He heard the sound and turned to me. We were already in front of the Manor. "So, when will you be back?"

"It is just a one day one night trip. I should be back by day after tomorrow, around the evening." I shrugged.

He nodded, said his goodbyes and left. I turned and nodded at the guard who opened the gates for me. We weren't supposed to do that. They were our servants. But I couldn't help it whenever I saw the layers of forlornness being concealed behind that perfect emotionless mask. A bit of acknowledgement wouldn't hurt him. He never replied to my greeting though, which only gave me a better sense of how I didn't belong here. Even he knew my place.

I went through my usual process of washing and changing, then trudged to the dining room, happily humming a song I had heard in the human world. 'He Wasn't' by Avril Lavigne. For the first time that I heard the song, I thought the girl did nothing but scream. But slowly, my ears got used to the loud music and I found I actually liked it, like some of those heavy metal songs the strawberry listened to, which were despicable when you first heard them but slowly started to grow in on you.

A servant bowed and opened the door for me. I smiled at her and got a small nod in return. My smile widened. At least, she _acknowledged_ me.

I entered to see my brother already seated. My eyes swept past the room before opening my mouth. "Byakuya Nii-sama." I greeted formally when I saw the servant hovering next to the table, filling his glass with an orange liquid I guessed was juice. "Rukia." He didn't even turn to look at me, keeping his eyes trailed on the table.

I went and sat down at my spot across the table from him. The servant came to serve me. Her head was bowed and her eyes hidden behind shadows. Her blond hair were done into a neat bun and held back with a silver buckle. She finished her job and flitted out of the room.

We had the meal in our all too familiar silence but it didn't feel half as bad as it used to. I was not uncomfortable. While earlier, I used to look for ways to get away from dinner but these days I actually felt eager to reach this time of the evening. I slurped up the last of the hot soup and looked up at him. "How was your day, Nii-sama?"

"Rukia, how many times have I told you to not call me that in private."

"Sorry."

"It went fine, with occasional berating directed towards Abarai. He is as stupid as one could get."

His eyes gazed into mine and I just couldn't keep my laughter in when he looked at me with such intensity while saying such a thing. "What is it that you find so funny with my plight?"

That only caused me to laugh harder. Ordinarily, I would be surprised if Byakuya said such a thing but in this past week, we had opened up to each other quite a lot. To the extent that he randomly cracked jokes as well and humor was something I always thought was beyond Byakuya Kuchiki.

"Nothing. That is so Renji."

"How about your day?"

"That reminds me, I have acquired permission for a one-night stay in the human world. I will be leaving tomorrow." I barely made out the soft crinkling of the skin between his brows and yet I was sure that was because he let me. Yet he said nothing and merely nodded. After a while of talking the servant returned to gather the dishes. He escorted me to my room and then left for his. The whole night was a sleepless one as anticipation and curiosity ate through me.

*TIME SKIP*

I turned on the all too familiar corner, heading for the town clinic. It would be about time for that orange head to return back from school. The thought brought a smile on my face.

I caught a drift of spiritual pressure heading my way as I raised my hand to knock on Kurosaki's front door. I received no response for about a minute, then the door opened to the smiling face of Yuzu. "Kuchiki-san!" Her smile widened and spread from ear to ear. She clasped her hands in front of her chest in happiness. I smiled at her.

"Rukia-chan!" I heard a loud scream in the background. A man in a white lab coat came running at me, only to be stopped by Karin with a kick in the face. She crossed her arms over her chest as she stepped on her father's face. She wished me steadily and then went to sit at the table, sipping something from a white porcelain cup. Seconds later had said man standing in front of the portrait of his wife complaining about how rude her daughters had become.

My formal smile turned heartfelt as the weirdly homely aura of Kurosaki household greeted me. I stepped inside with a small chuckle and a reply to Yuzu and Karin's greetings. I made myself comfortable on the table next to the other black-haired female as Yuzu went to get me something to drink.

"Say Rukia-chan, what brings you here?" Isshin said as he came to sit by me.

"I was missing my friends so I decided to come for a small outing kind of a thing." I shrugged as I lied cleanly to him. But somehow, his eyes made me feel he knew my purpose in coming here. A doorbell interrupted us. I leaned my chair on its two hind legs to peak over the big man and have a clear view of the door. It opened to reveal the strawberry I had come to see. And along with him was a certain brunette.

"Hi, Inoue-san!" Yuzu called from her head stuck in between a wooden cabinet as she searched for something there.

The couple finally noticed me sitting at the table. Inoue's eyes widened for a moment, then the surprise was overtaken by joy at my appearance. "Kuchiki-san!" She came up to me and grabbed my hand tightly. She leaned down and hugged me from over the wood. "I am so happy for you.", she whispered in my ear. I was taken aback. Had Ichigo already told her?

Ichigo!

I swung my head to find him staring at us with a scowl on his face before he turned the other way. Inoue finally released me and stood back to survey my form. "Another mission?" She asked quietly. But I could see the hope in her eyes. She didn't want me around. I wondered why. What was she doing here in the first place?

"No! Rukia-chan is here for a small picnic with her friends." Isshin's voice was calm and steady which was a start. Even Karin looked up at her father. He wouldn't act like this under any circumstances. His eyes gazed deep into Inoue's, as if… _warning_ her off.

Okay, now what the hell was going on here?

"So, do you want me to call all our friends? Tatsuki-chan will love it!" Inoue chirped happily.

Ugh, what had I gotten myself into? I needed to talk to Ichigo. Alone! "No, Inoue, let it be only our close friends. Chad, Ishida, you, me and Ichigo." At least that way I will be able to talk to him. I was also hoping desperately that by the time they would be informed and they would come here, I would get a moment with the idiot.

But of course, the idiot ruined all my plans.

"Hello, Chad?" his voice rang out as he spoke over the phone. "Rukia is here for a small picnic so grab that butthead and come over straight away. Don't worry about food. This _is_ a picnic after all." I felt like head butting him so hard he would fly right out of the town and get stuck on Tokyo tower.

He turned to me and the loss of that familiar warmth that he always tried so hard to conceal worried me. "There. They are on their way. I will be up in my room. Make yourself comfortable." With that he turned and marched off. I swear I felt the tension level of the room go up several notches. He never behaved that way to me. I looked down on the table. What had I lost?

Uryuu's POV

We knocked on Kurosaki's front door. Damn, he hurried Chad so bad over the phone, he practically dragged me up here. I sighed as I maintained my trademark expression. I was in no mood of seeing that idiot. Or Inoue-san, whose presence I could already sense.

The door was opened by Karin who ushered us into a busy living room. Kuchiki-san sat forlornly at the table and Kurosaki Isshin, who sat right by her was reading a newspaper, for once not bothering to disturb the silence that dawned over the two.

The other side of the table rang with laughter as Yuzu and Inoue-san talked about some alien sounding dish. The brunette caught sight of us first and I averted my eyes before she could lock hers upon them. I felt a hard pang hurt my chest. I couldn't even bear to look at her.

"They are here." Karin said, in an exaggeratedly bored manner and Yuzu said a warm welcome greeting as Kuchiki-san looked up at us and smiled. But that smile was not the usual, vibrant Kuchiki Rukia smile. It was half-hearted and tired. I wondered what was up with her. What felt strange was it was like I _knew_ why she acted that way.

*TIME SKIP*

I really had no idea why Kuchiki-san had even called for this picnic, seeing as she hadn't spoken a complete sentence with the same energetic vibe of hers to anyone, the whole way through the amusement park. Ichigo had been avoiding her while she had been avoiding Inoue-san, along with me. But of course, the brunette didn't care. So long as she had her 'Kurosaki-kun' She wasn't worried by the fact that no one spoke a word to her other than that idiotic Shinigami cause me and Kuchiki-san were talking barely, and that too, only with each other and Chad hadn't improved much in the field of communication.

I don't really know what lead us here, especially since none of us passed as above eighteen, but we were currently sitting on a couch in the back of the club, hearing the loud music churn in various unheard cacophonies. I guessed it was the tension of the day. And the fact that none of us got across as friends today, so silent and held back we all were.

I rose from my reverie as the dull clink of glass against wood sounded in my ears. I looked down to see Kurosaki place another glass next to his other neatly arranged empty glasses. He was preceded a moment later by Kuchiki-san. They were both drinking heavily tonight. While the girl looked like she could easily handle it, which she most probably could since she grew up a noble in Soul Society but I had never seen that brat drink before and he most likely won't be able to handle that much amount of alcohol.

His eyes lifted from his empty glass and found Kuchiki-san. They trailed her body in a way I never thought Kurosaki would be able to pull off. I felt something tighten in my throat. This night wasn't going to end well.

Just then a hulking guy with messy blond hair wandered up to our table wolf-whistling at some girl who was most probably battling her eyelashes at how 'sexy' he looked. He wore a shirt that was torn in the most convenient places for his tanned abs to show and his jeans was just a bit too worn out. He threw some of the stray strands wandering his forehead back along his jaw line as his eyes found our table and immediately narrowed on Inoue-san, who looked completely uncomfortable sitting there next to Kurosaki. She hadn't touched the booze, same as me. I watched her shift as she felt the man's hungry eyes on herself.

"Yo, babe, wanna hang out tonight?" his accent was a cheap one, probably picked up from some over-the-edge men's underwear commercial. At that, Kurosaki, who had already indulged himself in another glass, sent a small snaking ribbon of his reaitsu up to him. The human shuddered as he felt it touch his consciousness. "She is my girlfriend so back off, you bastard." He growled.

I saw Kuchiki-san stiffen right across from me. My brow furrowed in confusion. Didn't she know Inoue-san and Kurosaki had got together about a week ago? No one really was pleased by this pairing. Kurosaki was silent about it and seemed to lack an obvious enthusiasm, Isshin had made it clear she would have like Kuchiki-san better. Anyone who couldn't see my affection for Inoue-san clear as day was a fool and Chad disapproved because he thought it was wrong. For some strange reason it didn't take him, he said.

The petite Shinigami's disappointed eyes risked a glance at the orange-haired fool. His scowl had now been replaced by an amused smirk as he watched the guy's movements. I turned in time to see him catch hold of Kuchiki-san's elbow and pull her up, taking her by surprise, deciding she was better than Inoue-san, anyway. The short black skirt she wore flounced about her as she tried to free herself, obviously not putting too much force for fear of hurting the guy.

"You know, you don't really wanna mess with that one. Her guy is tougher than me." Kurosaki purred.

That was when I put two and two together. I looked up at Kuchiki-san who was looking down at the floor, wondering who it could be. Possibly Abarai. For some reason she had abandoned protesting against the man's grip. Probably to give Kurosaki a chance to speak. She still relied on him.

When he opened his mouth, the words he let out sent all that well-built trust cascading into an abyss of betrayal. "But he ain't really around, so see if you could have a blast." He winked at the man. My eyes widened as he started tugging on Kuchiki-san's elbow while she stood with her feet firmly planted on the floor, not moving an inch.

"Come on babe.", he purred in a sickeningly seductive voice. "I know you are a ho. Even your friend admits it. But oh well, who ain't these days?" he laughed as he put more pressure on her slender arm. I shot out and grabbed his wrist that was holding on to her and squeezed, hard enough to make him wince. I saw Kuchiki-san lower her outstretched palm as whatever Kido she had on her lips dissolved along with her clear aim at the man's penis. "She is not a ho and our friend here is just drunk." I gazed at Kuchiki-san as I said the last words, hoping to meet the beautiful violet orbs that were trailed on the ground, the fringe of her hair plunging them into deep shadows. That last part was meant for her.

A harsh, humorless chuckle drew my attention to Kurosaki. His cocked head dropped back into position. "Not a ho, eh? Then what else will you call a girl who kissed her own brother?"

I looked at the mentioned Shinigami in disbelief. Now I was so sure anyone who dared touch her would burn in the cherry blossom gardens of hell.

Her breathing quickened. The last I saw was a small sparkling teardrop fall to the floor before her foot met the man square in his jaw and she turned and rushed out of the club. She easily had the man unconscious with one powerful kick. I, in turn, reached across the table, drew back my fist and punched Kurosaki. "You fool!" I screamed. He looked up, not with an annoying frown but a changed eye color, indicating his Hollow had taken over. I gasped as he shunpo-ed out of sight without another word, his flaring reaitsu concealed impeccably behind him.

 **I wonder what is going to happen to Rukia O.O**

 **JoTerry: Yessss... XD I can see that you are an IchiRuki supporter. Well so am I. *twinsyy fist* Yay! But don't worry. We will have a lot of IchiRuki in the upcoming chapters (even if its negative?) and ByaRuki and RenRuki. Oh God I love Rukia! Well, tell me how you think this should end. :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Alright, here you go guys. I can't even explain how frustrated I was while writing this chapter. I would advice any of you with sensitivity to non-consensual lemon, should skip the first 'Rukia's POV' of this chapter. All those who ship IchiRuki, this couldn't be pleasant for you guys but it gets better. I promise.**

Rukia's POV

I peaked from under the shed. I had not felt anything but I was almost sure he would come. It was like a gut feeling and in our world your gut was supposed to be your natural risk determiner. I listened for footsteps and kept my mind on the alert for any traces of his reaitsu, that would either be flying around uncontrollably or concealed impeccably, and of the two, the latter was more likely.

I leaned against the pole that held the roof of the small should-have-been-a-bike-shed up. Tears threatened to leak but I couldn't let them. I choked back on the urge to sob and rocked back and forth, my arms wrapped around the small of my body. I pressed my head so bad on my knee that I could feel the bone through my skull but still the pain felt like it was not even worth noticing. I wanted to cry. Wanted to cry so bad…..

I let my eyelids droop over my moisture-deprived eyes. Was it possible to get an urge to cry? Cause I sure was getting one. I let my tired brain loll off to the sounds of the cars honking their horns on the distant crossing. My vision trailed my fallen gigai once. It lay in the corner, after I had discarded it. I allowed myself to approach the certain dark patch in my mind that had been left untouched for way too long. I felt its tendrils expand in my conscious as Sode no Shirayuki slowly drew me to sleep.

I am not sure what woke me up. But my eyes opened to gaze into a pair of deranged ones, with amber iris and dark black cornea. I felt mine widen as Ichigo's Hollow grinned at me. I scrambled for my sword but he pinned me down, holding my wrists close to the sides of my body. He loomed over me. The small shed fit us just smugly and right now he was straddling me. "What do you want?" I cried as I struggled against him but he was just a bit too strong.

"Who are you talking to princess, me or King?" he smirked.

"Ichigo!", I screamed.

"He cannot hear you, princess. Or even if he can, there is absolutely nothing he can do to help you tonight."

That was when the precise sense of impending doom dawned on me. Ichigo's inner Hollow was in control of his body. He couldn't possibly be up to any good. He won't let me reach my sword. Even if I did, there was no way I could fend him off. And there was no one to help me.

Shit!

I started struggling vehemently and he just laughed off all my attempts. It angered me even more to see how helpless I was and how cocky he was being about it. My arms were pinned to my side and my legs were trapped under his, my knees locked in place by the sheer weight of his thighs. I couldn't reach my zanpakuto, which was strapped to my waist. Neither could I fire a Kido without aiming at him. All I could do was cuss and call him names, which I was putting all my heart and mind into.

"You fucking bastard get off of me!" I screamed as I tried in vain to bend my knee and hit him. He just chuckled. I wasn't getting anywhere with this. I tried to twist every possible part of my body in every possible angle but they refused to comply, that and his weight over me locked me in place.

He leaned down, his lips abrading the side of my jaw bone. I stiffened as I felt his harsh cold lips against my skin. A shiver of anticipation ran down me as he just remained there skimming my jaw and enjoying me writhe. "You know princess, King feels so many things for you. Wants to do so much to you….. things his heart and subconscious relishes in but his conscious will never allow him to. This is why he seeks me to accomplish all of that for him, for in me he receives freedom from the judgment of others. And I will gladly fulfill his desires.

"You haunt his dreams and nightmares, both and you don't seem to go away. He wants to do things like this to you….." My eyes widen as I feel his white knuckles hit the opposite side of my jaw. Hard. The impact jarred my skull and made my teeth chatter in my mouth. I bit hard on my tongue and feel a bitter liquid leak in my mouth. The blood from my tongue. I wince but do not scream.

"But at the same time, he wants to do this…." He leaned down and finally brought his hovering lips to rest on my skin as he trailed downwards. "And so much more." He leaned up and smirked. "Without your permission."

I gasped at the meaning, and immediately was consumed by an urge to roll over and start coughing but since he won't let me move, I leaned back and spat the blood in my hair. The coughs chafed my throat on their way out and it hurt so bad I just wanted to collapse in helpless sobs. But of course, that might as well just be because of the things that have been happening all day today.

His next move alienated me further. He hooked a finger under my sheath and tore it away from my belt, hurling my sword away. Had it been naked, it would have burned him since he didn't own it but it was covered in the leather casing so it did no harm at all.

His maniacal laughter rang in time with my screams and thumping heart beat. "I hope King enjoys this." If all that had happened didn't, his words broke me. I knew that strawberry was a fool, but…..had he really wanted this all along. I felt my head droop as my arms fell limp along my sides. If he would have released them, he would have realized he didn't need to hold me down anymore.

All of a sudden, I was so… _numb._

I felt tears escape my eyes and trickle down my cheeks, disappearing down my neck and into my blood and mud soaked hair. Some part of me rejoiced that I was finally crying. I had been strong for way too long. Was this really how my best friend saw me all along? I just wanted to escape now. And I was willing to die if that was the only way out.

What did I have left anyway?

I groaned in pain as his fingers danced over the patch he had punched me. Tears were overflowing now. I felt my shoulders hunch but he didn't mind as that would not hurdle his purpose. He leaned back and watched me for a few moments. Then his tongue slicked out of his mouth, dangling over his lower lip. "Are you crying, princess?" He threw his head back and laughed. That only triggered more sobs.

He carefully lifted his hind off of me. I could take this time to escape, except that he still had my arms pinned and I couldn't find the will to. He drew my arms over my head and pinned them above me under one single palm, holding them at bay. He reached toward his pants hem with his now free hand, a deranged smile on his face.

I closed my eyes as the pressure in my chest increased. I searched my mind for that dark spot but it didn't seem to be in there. I was aware of his breaths and could make out the distant honking in greater detail now. I was dangling between consciousness and lack of it, waiting to be embraced by my inner world. It was far, far away from my reach. I let a tendril of my consciousness reach towards it and prod it. _'_ _Please…..'_ I begged.

 _'_ _Rukia.'_ I heard a helpless sounding female voice call out my name.

I felt the weight of a body collide against mine, then the world went blank.

Ichigo's POV

I woke up to the unfamiliar feeling of discomfort and soreness. I raised a hand to rub my eye in an attempt to drown out the sleep. My mattress felt softer than ever today, only that it seemed shorter.

My hand reached down to scratch at my thigh through my pant as I tried my level best to force my eyelids open. They seemed heavier today. I noticed how the sun shone brighter than it did in my room, and how it was hotter…. And how I didn't feel cloth covering my thigh.

I was naked.

I sat up, alert. The first thing my eyes met when they opened was another pair of purple ones. I recognized them immediately as they stared back at me. Only they lacked their ever present sparkle, or the hint of annoyance they always held, they seemed so dull and dare I say, lifeless.

My eyes travelled down to the midget's face that was set in a perfect mask of indifference, or what was supposed to be that, for her face clearly showed how tired she was. Her eyes were red-rimmed, like she had been crying till she ran out of tears. The steady line of her lips drooped on its edges, pulled down by weariness. Her cheeks sagged and the side of her face was stained with dried blood.

The moment I beheld her, my memories came rushing back to me.

My eyes widened in horror and I scrambled off of her, grabbing the pair of jeans I had discarded earlier last night. I felt like clawing my eyes out and ripping my hair into shreds as I watched her lay there, her lower uniform torn and ripped in the most undignified places. Tears brimmed in my eyes as she watched me with her dead looking eyes. They had lost their sparkle. Her mouth opened and her lips curled around the word weakly before delivering it to me. "Why?"

It was such a small word but it was miraculous how much pain it could cause me. My tears spilled out on my cheeks as I lunged forward to grab her but she cringed away, as if contact with me would sting her. It broke my heart into pieces. I lowered my eyes, trusting the hair I had allowed to overgrow to conceal them in shadows. Nothing happened for a few minutes. She just lay there. Eventually, her sobs entered my ears but I dared not look at her. Slowly her sobs turned into screams of frustration as she pulled at her hair and screeched at herself for ever trusting me. At times, she had to double over and cough and I knew that was all my doing.

After about half an hour, she staggered up on her feet, disoriented. She went and picked her zanpakuto. That was the moment I chose to look up at her and I did not see the girl I had known. The girl who was broken to the point that she had no tears left for her. The girl who screamed at herself for being so weak not because she actually believed it, but because that was her only respite cause she couldn't bear the fact that someone she loved had hurt her. The person I saw was cold and held back and with condescending eyes, instead of tired or sad ones. Her gaze swept over me as she clipped the sword to her belt and left, leaving her discarded gigai to stare at me as I broke down behind her back.

Rukia's POV

I reached Urahara's shop to find the two small kids fighting as usual at the door, while Ururu at least _tried_ to sweep. When she caught sight of me her mouth started to move, but then she stopped and turned to the doors instead. She threw them open in a flash and ran inside, with the red-haired boy that always reminded me of the older red-haired man following after her all for the sake of following.

By the time I was in front of the door, a worried looking Urahara and Yoruichi were already on the threshold. A start for those two, but oh well.

"Rukia?", Yoruichi questioned as she came towards me.

"Will you please open a Senkaimon (I so don't know if I spelled that right) for me, to the Soul Society?"

"Of course Kuchiki-san but what…" Urahara began but he was interrupted by a death glare from Yoruichi. I was incredibly grateful to her for that. "We will. Come inside for now."

She placed a hand on the small of my back and guided me further into the back of the shop. I smiled gratefully but I do not know if she noticed. She allowed me to wash my face and clean the blood from my hair and gave me some spare clothes to change into while they repaired my uniform. It was a normal human t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. She waited behind the door while I changed. I stepped outside once I was ready and handed her my torn uniform. I had never seen the motherly and concerned side of Yoruichi Shihoin but it was clearly something I wanted to preserve for myself.

She told me to go into the room, which had a futon set up for use, and wait for her. I followed her instructions, indulging myself in observing the small details of the room as I sat with my legs folded beneath me. Anything to keep me from thinking back on yesterday.

The clothes were extremely comfortable and my eyes were inexplicably drawn to the futon. It was like it was set here as a tempting trap because it wasn't there when I first came. I got up unsteadily and winced at how sore I was, then I wobbled to the bedding and collapsed gratefully in it, with a soft sigh. I kept running a narration on the last Hollow I fought to keep my brain occupied till she entered.

I tried to sit up when I saw the doors sliding open and Yoruichi handed me a glass of juice, much needed refreshment. Then she forced me back down into the comfortable embrace of the silken sheets as she sat by me in silence for a few minutes. The lack of conversation bit me in my but because I knew the questions would be coming soon and this anticipation wasn't helping. Finally, she decided to satisfy her curiosity.

"Something happened, Rukia?"

"It did." I tried my best to remain blunt and monotone.

"Mind telling me what?"

"Yes."

"Have a problem if I coerce it out of you?" the corners of her mouth twitched up in a much more familiar smile, easing her lips of their slight pucker. She cocked her head to the side. I was confused if this was a relief or not.

"Yes but you can try."

"Hmm… let's see. Does it involve Ichigo?"

"Yes."

"Began last night or has been going on for long?"

"I like to think last night but things suggest otherwise." I wasn't going to answer any more questions.

"Did it range from a fight or are you still not sure what fueled it?"

"I do not know but even if I knew I won't tell you. I can't talk about this anymore."

She cocked her head, as if to think. After a few minutes of terse silence I turned on my back, away from her. A minute passed in silence, then she said, "Did he propose you incorrectly?"

That forced a mirthless laughter out of me. Tears began to cloud my vision and black spots started to appear in my head, inviting me to unconsciousness. I wasn't surprised. I was at Urahara's. My laughter turned louder and wilder as I fought against the tempting offer to just let it go. My survival instincts had awakened now and I wasn't going to just fall asleep. I was surprised at how hollow my voice sounded as image after image from last night surfaced in my head. Tears started spilling out but the continuous involvement of my throat elsewhere held the sobs at bay. My stomach seemed to be flipping though I had had nothing but the juice but it might be the reason behind the flipping for all I knew.

My laughter grew hoarse and sounded forced. Till my hysteria strengthened and I started crying, bawling into my hands. "Rukia?!" I heard a worried call and someone shook my shoulder but I couldn't see them. I was back in last night. I let out a piercing scream, so high-pitched I couldn't recognize my voice as all the pain and hurt crashed over me again in a fit of madness and desperation. I clawed at my face but someone forced my hands away.

I managed to at least threaten to kill him before I allowed whatever drug they had put in the juice to draw me to sleep.

 **I am feeling so sorry for her. -_- I am proven evil now.** **But the plot needed it. Anyways, tell me how you liked it guys? Please?**


	7. Chapter 7

**Nobody knows who I really am,**  
 **I never felt this empty before,**  
 **And if I ever need someone to come along,**  
 **Who's gonna comfort me and keep me strong?**  
 **Guys go listen to this song. It was used in the first Bleach ending. It is on YouTube as Life is Like a Boat by Rei Fu. It is wonderful. Even though I do not understand the Japanese parts, I totally love it! Plus, it was basically put on Rukia and the world knows she is my favorite character. So yeah.**

Byakuya's POV

I watched over her as she slept. It had already been seven hours. Yoruichi had told me the drug would take a while to wear off but that did not help my nerves. What could have gone wrong in the human world? Half of me was tearing to go to that sick headed brat's house and find out for myself what he had done while the other half was unwilling to leave her side.

My fingers clasped around her small white hand. It was so cold she could have as well been dead. I shook my head in a vague attempt to somehow shake the thought away as well. I could hear her breath, sense her spirit force flicker and that was what I was going to concentrate on. I shifted a bit to adjust myself better on her small futon. If she had informed me it was so small I would have had it exchanged by now. My head finally came to rest on the small pillow we shared and I stared at her beautiful raven mane.

I had no idea how she would react to me sleeping with her but I hoped it would not be enough to bring the house down. A small smile spread across my mouth. It was not like I expected any less of her. Hell knew the woman _could_ get things done in the most reckless way possible. And I was not eager to experience the same.

There was a knock on the door. I sighed. I already knew who it was. I couldn't have opened the door even if I wanted, anyway. "Tell him she is still sleeping.", I called through the door. I did not exert myself though. It was my servants' duty to hear me no matter how low I spoke. I felt the maid's spiritual pressure scurry away to inform my lieutenant of the same. This was the fifth time he had visited. He was overly-concerned and it was getting to me.

I snuggled closer to her as my hand stroked the back of her hair. It was quite soft. I smiled contentedly. I honestly, had no reason to ask for anything else.

I felt her stir in my grasp. I loosened my hold on her waist a bit to allow appropriate movement. She started fidgeting and her lips drew back as if she was about to say something. A moment later, her eyelids lifted to reveal two milky purple orbs. They stared at me in confusion for a moment as she tried to get the sleep to wear off, then widened in realization.

Her reaction was immediate. She had managed to push me off the futon and gather the sheets up around the human clothes she was wearing before I knew. She looked at me in pure fear and nervousness which totally tore my heart apart. A shudder ran down her diminutive frame, which could be made out from under the sheets. I felt my mouth draw into a quick line instinctively and her jaw dropped open.

"S-sorry Nii-sama. P-p-please f-forgive my behavior. I-I am really sorry. Sleep seems to have addled my senses." She tried and failed in bowing with the sheets still wrapped around her body. She pressed her closed fists to her chest, which I recognized as a gesture girls made in awkward and self-conscious situations. I had never expected that of her. I moved forward swiftly and grabbing her small waist hugged her close. I didn't want to hear her piercing words. I wanted her to realize I was right here. She pressed against my chest, trying to break free. I let go, reluctantly but did not pull my arms away.

I gazed at her but she looked away from me. She bit her bottom lip and shivered. Tension could have made me break a sweat now. What was wrong with her?

"Did something happen to you, Rukia?" Despite everything, I couldn't help feeling like she had rejected me. Then, her lower lip started wobbling even violently. I had the urge to hug her but resisted it. She closed he eyes and swallowed before releasing a small whimper. She pulled her hands up to her face and buried it in them. Her shoulders started shaking as she sobbed wildly.

"Rukia!" I was hyper ventilating now.

"Please…..", she whisper/begged.

"What? Is there something you need?", I asked, encouraging her to talk.

"Please just, leave."

Her words tore me in half but I guessed she needed her space. I got up from the floor and advanced towards the door. "Half an hour." Her voice made me turn. "After half an hour, can you please send Renji in?" The light was lost in her eyes and they looked so dead it scared me. How had I not noticed it before? Her face was soaked in tears and her eyes were so emotionless that they seemed inhuman. I felt a pang hurt my chest, though I was unsure as to whether it was due to her misery or the fact that she trusted Renji more capable of easing it than me. Why was it? Because I had not shown her all along? Was it my indifference? I almost winced. Sometimes, I wondered if she had become way too much of a Kuchiki and it would be impossible to get through the idea of me loving her. My heart hurt but I nodded curtly and left.

Rukia's POV

I watched him leave. I could feel the pain he concealed once again. I wondered if it would be easier if he just let it show? Then maybe, I would remember Kuchiki Byakuya could be hurt.

I sighed as I shifted back under the futon and continued to cry. Would I ever be able to stop? Didn't look so. I knew I shouldn't have pushed him away that way. But I couldn't help it. Having a male so close after what had happened was a bit too much for me.

But I knew one could help. The one who had been there when I hit puberty. Renji.

Renji's POV

"Abarai fukutaicho?"

I spun around as the much awaited servant from Kuchiki manor stood at my door. His face was set in perfect indifference. He was different from the female who had come to tell me how I could not meet Rukia yet every single time so I guessed I could now. "Yes?"

"Kuchiki-san requests your presence? If you would please follow me…"

I had flash stepped in front of the manor before the servant could have finished his pompous speech. A summon was a summon, whether you put it as 'Kuchiki-san requests your presence' or 'Rukia is calling you'. Both got the same point across so why bother. That was what I kept musing about as another servant led me to my best friend room. Exactly how many of them did they have here?

The door opened to reveal her sitting in front of one of those expensive rice doors (is that what they call them) looking out over the garden. The servant bowed next to me and left. I stepped inside and secured the door behind me.

"Renji." Her deep voice penetrated the silence of the room. I was sure it was not my reaitsu, that was concealed impeccably. It was something different. Something way deeper.

"Yo, Rukia." I hated how my voice sounded so gruff when compared to Kuchiki Taichou's.

Her head cocked back and she patted the spot next to herself, inviting me to sit. I obliged without delay. I noticed how she was wearing human clothes. We remained silent for a few minutes, just letting the soft breeze blow through our hair. I put my hand over hers, and immediately felt her fingers tangle with mine. That lit me face.

"What happened, Rukia?"

I so wish I hadn't asked that question. She removed her hand form mine and I could barely keep myself from reaching out to grasp it. She drew back and lay her head against the door frame. "Let's not talk about that Renji. I want to be with my best friend for a while." She turned to look at me and my eyes widened at how emotionless those purple orbs that were almost flickering with energy were. "Make me forget please?"

How could I resist that look?

"Do you remember the guessing game we used to play back in Rukongai?"

She nodded. "I will take it. Guess my favorite animal."

If it were so, that in some other dimension we were just an Anime/Manga series and a stupid writer was writing an equally stupid story which had no head or tail to please her wonderful readers, I am sure they could have seen me sweat drop. "Uh, rabbit?"

"Bingo!"

"Yeah, now you guess my favorite person in the whole of Seireitei."

"Um…. Rangiku-san?"

I knew she had taken a random guess but I couldn't help teasing her. Plus, her ignorance annoyed me. "No. but I like the way you are thinking."

That got me a punch in the face.

"Who is it?", she demanded.

"You."

"Alright."

The game went on for a few hours till it was time for me to leave. She came up to the front door to escort me and I knew that was about all I could expect from the Kuchikis. Byakuya did not show me his face even once and I got this weird impression that he was mad at me about something.

We stood under the shade of the high poles that held the gate up. I noticed how the setting sun elongated their shadows and made them look five times bigger than they already were. Yes, it was getting late and I needed to do something.

I straightened and did a weird imitation of a bow, which only a hunchback could be capable of. "Yo, Kuchiki-san, I beg your leave. Kindly do inform your monstrous brother that I did not lay a finger on the precious Kuchiki treasure."

She rounded her foot and kicked me. In the jaw. Square. I staggered back in pain but at least I got her to laugh. I looked at the dark circles under her eyes, or were they sleep-bags? I had no idea. My heart churned in my chest, urging me to do something, anything. But I could only stand there and gaze at her. Suddenly, it felt like I had already lost her. This was not my Rukia. This was not _the_ Rukia.

"Should I leave now?", I asked. I realized how wrong that had come out but she did not seem to mind. She opened her mouth as if to say something but then shut it abruptly and looked away. Her eyes teared up but I dared not ask why. I knew pushing her will only make her procrastinate in her confession. Even so, some part of me screamed that this was because of the strain in our friendship, because of me.

I turned to exit the building. "Renji.", she called. It had me turning in a flash, the tone of her voice seemed the familiar Rukia of District 78 tone, not Rukia the Kuchiki clan's member tone. I searched her face for any signs of the old Rukia, the one who would have forgiven me. But all I saw was a girl who looked blanched yet feverish at the same time. She was all skin and bones and her eyes had sunk further in their sockets. Even so, when she smiled she was the most thing I had ever laid eyes on. Because it assured me that things could go back to how they used to be, and possibly, move further.

"Thank you, Renji."

Ichigo's POV

"Inoue, we need to talk. Meet me at the café."

*TIME SKIP*

"What do you mean we need to break it up?" Tears gathered in her eyes, which tore me apart, or what was left of me. No doubt I cared about her. But not half as much as Rukia.

 _Rukia._

"Kurosaki-kun!" She shook my hand to bring me back into reality. The old couple sitting next to us turned and gave me a disapproving glare. Shit. I so knew I should have done this via text message.

"Look, even after we got together we still call each other by our last names. You call me Kurosaki-kun and I call you Inoue. That is so not couple like….."

"Do you want me to start calling you Ichigo? Alright, Ichigo, how are you?" She blushed and covered her mouth moments after she said that. "It doesn't mean I respect you any less….."

"To me, a relationship is not about respect, its about….."

"Care? Concern? Space? What? I am sure I….."

"My family doesn't approve of you. Three-fourth of it doesn't at least and that includes me….."

"I am sure I can win them over….."

"I don't think this is working. You…..."

"Give me a chance, Kurosaki-kun, please I will do anything….."

"Inoue!" I stood up, banging my fists on the table. By this point, I just didn't care who was looking. I had to get her off of me. "All we have been doing this past _hour_ is cut each other off! How do you think this could work?! Please, Inoue, please! Face the truth!"

She lowered her head and whispered. "Kuchiki-san did this right?"

"Excuse me?"

She turned up to glare at me. "Can't you fucking get it through your head?!" She stood up. "She has chosen who she wanted and it is NOT you! She doesn't deserve you!"

I turned around and started running away.

She was right?

She didn't deserve me?

Hell.

I was the one who did not deserve her. She had chosen who she wanted and she had chosen well.

 **Woah. This got out of hand. So did not go how I planned but oh well -_- Comment guys! You have no idea how they make my day. And please tell me of the three which one of them you want Rukia to end up with? Or, do you want separate routes? Like an Otome game? Comment!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello! I know I have not updated in a long ass while but like I said the updates won't be so frequent now that school has started. Plus, I was grounded. YET AGAIN -_- I am sorry but this time I don't even have any idea what I was grounded about. Um, guys I have no idea where to proceed from now on so till I cook something up I will be uploading some random fics here all to keep you entertained. Please bear with me and if any of you have ANY kind of ideas x-y-z please comment them. How do you want the story to proceed or just about anything in general. Cause I have forgotten what I planned to do. Sorry!**

 **Suppose Ichigo and Rukia get married and have a daughter and she gets her first boyfriend of whom NO ONE other than Rukia approves. Oh well…. XD**

 **P.S. I have no idea where Yuzu went. Let's just imagine she is off to somewhere, eh guys?**

 **P.S.S. Let us forget the whole Soul Society deal here. This is set in a normal universe.**

 **P.S.S.S. Or wait, let them remain Soul Reapers. Ugh! I can't decide. You will figure out in the story.**

 **P.S.S.S.S The story was incredibly stressed out so this is my way of lightning up the atmosphere a bit. Hope it workssss/**

 **P.S.S.S.S.S. Some of you think I am a Byaruki fan. No, I am a Rukia fan. Thats it. I don't personally 'prefer' any pairing but if I was asked I would NEVER ship her with any one other that the strawberry, the red-butt-head and the stuck up, dried up, spaghetti. (honestly?!) The story has more of ByaRuki moments because unlike Ichigo and Renji, Byakuya and Rukia barely ever talked! So that arc had to be expanded more.**

"What is your problem?!"

A soft whiny voice wafted up to the upper rooms, making Ichigo finally release his wife. She got off his lap and straightened, smirking. "Our children have the best timing in the world. Don't you think so, huh?" All she got in response was a grunt and some serious cussing. As protected a life as she had lived in the Kuchiki household, the raven haired midget was still not used to the intensive language her husband seemed to be so fond of. She snorted and shimmied away from him. He made a valiant effort to grab her only to have his hand swatted away earning another grunt.

"Mom me and the stupid possessed potato you picked up from the trash can thirteen years ago are back." A bored male voice followed a second later. It was kind of deep, but not quite, indicating the child hadn't made it through puberty. Rukia just sighed and twisted the door knob. She was about to descend down the stairs but upon second thoughts, turned to survey the strawberry who had immersed himself in his work again. She growled as a warning, only to be ignored, then grabbed his collar and hoisted him off his seat.

"Oi Rukia what the fuck?!" Ichigo cried as she threw him down the stairs. He landed in a heap at the bottom. Rukia landed next to him, with her foot on his head. She stomped hard as a vein popped in her head. "What is it gonna take to get it through your head that your family needs your time as well, you crazy joker reject?!"

He folded his hands above his head. "Sorry! I get the point I swear!"

She got off of him, grumbling as she dragged him over to the dining table. Said man, who had been limp till now sprang up at the sight of his little daughter. "Cana!" He jumped up to hug her thin waist. The small orange haired beauty turned up and buried her face in her father's chest. "Daddy!"

"The way you act so childishly sometimes," The sixteen years old boy with spiky black hair and brown eyes shook his head as he scowled. "You make me believe you are your father's son."

Before anyone could respond, the door was thrown open and in darted a hurricane (which later turned out to be Isshin). Ichigo barely dodged the kick that was aimed at his stomach, but managed to dart to the side with Cana taken protectively in his arms. But that wasn't done, for he had a whole series of punches and kicks to deal with after that once his father set their youngest son down, who, to Ichigo's obvious dislike, seemed to be really fond of his grandfather.

Rukia turned to gaze at her family and sighed softly as she smiled, the knife placed over the vegetable totally forgotten for the time being. Isshin managed to punch Ichigo straight in the face. Cana was squealing in delight as Ichigo swung her along with himself. It was surprising how her daughter was still so childish even though she was thirteen. Her purple orbs widened in amusement as she laughed. And as much as she knew, Ichigo would take a thousand more punches if she just kept laughing like that. Hide, was as usual, scowling as he texted someone.

She shook her head and turned down when she felt a small tug on her apron. She looked down at the little bob-head of brown hair to find a cuddly white face smile up at her, with drool dripping from the corners of his mouth. She leaned down and picked her little child up. Somewhere in the far corner she heard Karin scream at the two for not letting her or Toushiro sleep.

She giggled softly. She had the best family in the world. Retarded, but best nevertheless.

"Mommy I won't let Orangey get you tonight!" Kiyo screamed in his soft, child like voice as he put his hands protectively around his mother's neck. That got Ichigo's attention. He pried his father's hands off of his neck, set Cana down and walked over to his wife, putting his arms around her waist while smirking. "Rukia is mineeeee!" He stuck his tongue out at the little boy who seethed at his words and tried to get his arms off his mother, only to fail.

"I didn't let Renji steal her. What makes you think I will let you, Ichigo-junior?"

Hide pranced up and came to stand next to his parents at his father's words. Rukia glared at him playfully for such a failed attempt at secret eavesdropping. But she knew he was just playing around.

"I always knew that red head had something for my daughter." Isshin stroked his chin as he tried to act wise while sitting in a far corner. Someone threw something at him, and Ichigo was more thankful than ever before as he watched Kiyo latch on to Rukia's neck making her clear laughter ring in his ears. He smiled contently. His life was happier than he could imagine though he still had to be on a lookout for Byakuya attempting to return Rukia to where she 'belonged'. He chuckled silently. As annoying as fighting that noble was, Rukia liked to see her brother get possessive of her so he did too.

"You know I got a proposal for a date today." Cana said from where she sat at the head of the table. That spot was hers and no one could change that, spoiled as she was, being the only female child in the household. "I accepted! Now I have a boyfriend!"

Next what followed was a row of scampering footsteps as her father, grandfather and brother crowded around her, Rukia and Kiyo forgotten temporarily.

"What did he see in you?!" The table shuddered under the weight of Hide's hand as he glared at Cana.

"Who was he?!" The shuddering just got worse as another pair of brown eyes joined the staring contest.

"How dare he?!" Isshin jumped from over Cana's head and landed on his haunches in front of her, on the table, his hands pushing Ichigo's and Hide's heads down so they lay on the table. "It seems like a few days ago that I was craving for grandchildren and now even my granddaughter has grown up…" His fake crying was stopped as Karin kicked his head.

"What the heck is going on here?!" She glared at her father, who was already in front of his wife's portrait as Toushiro stood leaning against the wall, looking bored. That was his default expression every time he came to spend the weekend with his girlfriend.

"Cana was proposed by a boy at school!" Hide exclaimed.

"So?"

"I have been waiting to ask that." Rukia said as she sat Kiyo on the slap and resumed cutting vegetables.

"What?!" Another pair of hands landed on the table. "Who?! When?! How?! Why?!" Everyone turned to stare at the white-haired Captain (I have decided I will let them be what they are originally supposed to be) but he did not seem to care as he glared at his niece.

"Calm down everyone. It is just a date." Cana raised her hands, palm up, in front of her. "It is not like he is going to seduce me, then kidnap me, then rape me, then leave me to die, then if I survive, blackmail me with my videos."

"Um, Cana….. You just made it worse." Karin sweat dropped.

"I know exactly what boys this age have in mind! That bastard is going to steal my precious princess from me at the age of thirteen only to never give her back!" Ichigo screamed.

"Looks like you just recounted what you and Rukia went like, on Kuchiki." Toushiro, who had reverted back to his, held back personality muttered with closed eyes and an ever present frown. Ichigo screamed something about him and Rukia being ' _real'_ as the said female came to sit next to her daughter, while somehow managing to get the others besides those two testosterone powered males sit in their places on the small table as well. How she did that was unknown to everyone, but she managed.

"You know, I didn't really know what a date meant in the human world, so when Ichigo asked me out on one I went and asked Nii-sama what that meant. He had no idea either. To him, a date was a date, a series of digits to mark a day, so he asked our translator to figure out what it meant. And the list he presented Nii-sama with,…." She shook her head as she remembered.

"Had me within an inch of my life, but you get that quite a lot when you are dealing with such delusional nobility." Ichigo muttered as he sat down with Toushiro.

"So, Cana, tell us about this boy." Karin said and Rukia nodded enthusiastically.

"So finding him and killing him would be easier." Hide mumbled with a suddenly dark aura pulsating around him.

"Shut up, Hide and Cana, continue."

"Okay, he is two years older to me and is called Kaname. He is an American transfer but is originally Japanese. And he is so cute! He is on top of his form! He is great at cooking and drawing as well….."

Her speech was cut off as the door was thrown open and in walked the rest of the gang that is Orihime, Chad and Ishida, with Yuzu at their tail. "Who is great at cooking? I already love him!" Orihime squealed as she came and gave Rukia a quick, yet suffocating hug.

"Um, Inoue-san, won't you do well to remember that you are engaged?" Uryuu suggested. Ichigo snorted. "Maybe she finally figured out she could have done better than you, stupid four eyed jerk!"

"That _sooo_ doesn't look good coming from you." Rukia snapped, then turned her attention to her brown haired bff. "He is our Cana's first guy. You said something about him being able to draw?" She sat back and stroked her non-existent stubble with eyes closed. "Maybe I can finally have someone to talk to about the art like real pros."

Everybody sweat dropped at that but Rukia did not notice. Ichigo pounded his fists on the table. "No one named _Kaname_ can date my daughter!"

His was rewarded with a sharp smack across his face. "Not every Kaname is the same you butt-headed fool!" Rukia screamed with shark teeth appearing suddenly.

"So as I was saying, he is every teacher's favorite. He has wavy brown hair and emerald eyes and looks so cute!"

"Is it the same guy who transferred here about a month ago? Damn, he got popular pretty easily. Again, just what did he see in you?" Hide leaned over to poke his sister's forehead. "Did you bewitch him, you little jerk?"

"Daddy!"

"Hide get off her!"

Uryuu just sighed at the scene in front of him. Kiyo and Ichigo had started fighting over Rukia again. Karin had started arguing with her boyfriend, about spaghetti? It looked so. Yuzu and Inoue were cooking up some alien dish and Isshin was trying to explain to Chad the perks of having a 'bedmate'. And it was all to his credit that the Jamaican's embarrassment was quite obvious. Hide was glaring daggers at his sister who was currently having a fangirl moment. Kurosaki household could never be called normal, no matter how you looked at it.

"There, there, let's not be so rash guys." Inoue tried to pacify everyone only to be awarded with a couple identical glares and Rukia's sigh as she pushed her husband off her son.

"Everybody!" Rukia managed to attract everyone's attention at once with a single word. "Cease and desist, lest I call Unohana-taichou!" She waited for everyone to stop talking, which didn't take long after the mention of the scary Captain. She resumed once silence prevailed. "Cana I suppose you are going on a date today?" she received a nod. "Alright, you may go and only _you_ may go." She managed to glare at all the male members of the family and outside, simultaneously. "If there is any disturbance and if you try to ruin my daughter's first date I will sue you all for the murder of Chappy in the court of souls, get that? Hereby, all the males present in the room, including Hide and Kiyo, are grounded. Those who have to leave will leave once Cana returns and if you try anything stupid at school Hide I will send you off to your uncle's for a whole _week!"_

No one dared respond to Rukia's threat as the females carried Cana and Kiyo to the younger female's room to doll her up and probably, give her some pep talk that it was beyond everyone what Karin would tell the girl, though she seemed as excited as Yuzu. Ichigo sat back. "At least I am certain my Karin would at least tell Cana to be on the lookout and hit if needed." Isshin said.

"No." Toushiro folded his arms over his chest. "She will probably give her a talk on the importance of condoms. The girl insists on the use of those things, like Aizen would be revived if they were not worn."

Everybody sweat dropped while Ichigo glared at the shorter male. "You do those things with my sister?!" He had borrowed Rukia's shark teeth who knows when.

"Why do you think I come here to spend the weekends you retard?"

"That is besides the point." Hide interrupted. "We have to do something and not just sit around and hope things don't get as far as _that._ "

Ichigo smirked. "Oh we will make sure they don't."

"We are grounded." Uryuu mumbled.

"Yeah, but they aren't."

*TIME SKIP*

Cana looped her arm around her boyfriend's as he led them to the table he had booked. Turns out, he was not just incredibly handsome, but rich as well. He pulled the chair out for her and helped her into it before sitting himself, smiling softly, and rather bashfully all the while.

The girl played with the hem of her dress, occasionally meeting his eyes, blushing, and looking back down as they waited for someone to come take their order. The breeze blew around them making her worry about her hairdo, while also admire how cute he looked with his hair all over the place. Something sparkly caught her eye and she craned her neck to get a clear view of the far end of the open restaurant they sat in. There, sitting in a long table, facing the couple were the men she would never want to see at such a time. Byakuya, Renji, Kenpachi, Ikkaku, Yumichika, Hisagi, Kira and Urahara sat in gigais, glaring daggers at them. Her eyes popped out as she muttered 'shit'

"What is wrong?" Kaname asked, frowning.

Cana turned to him. "Nuh-uh. Nothing. It is just my uncle's are here."

"So what is the big deal?" Kaname understood the moment he turned around to survey the guys. It was a public restaurant and it had been seconds since Cana saw them but they all sat playing cards now, while Byakuya and Kira just watched. Renji, Ikkaku, and Kenpachi's shirts, that they had (surprisingly!) bothered to put, seemed to have magically disappeared revealing the tattoos, abs and scars.

"Tell me I am looking at the wrong table." Kaname muttered as he tried his best to meet Byakuya's glare and smile politely at him.

"No, you aren't."

"So, _all_ of them are your uncles? No mistakes? Is it the table with the scary looking beast-cum-men with awesome abs and tattoos and scars and death glares and whatnot, who look like they are ready to kill?"

"Yeah." She sweat dropped at how alike their thinking was. "But they most probably won't do anything."

The men chose that very moment to start walking towards their table. She could practically _see_ Kaname almost pee his pants. "Your parents know don't they?" He turned towards the girl hurriedly, who just nodded. "Then they can't really have a problem, can they?"

"Most probably, yes."

"Um, you have an interesting family."

"Quite, boy!" They heard a growl behind him and Kaname was lifted from the back of his shirt by Renji. "Now let's see what you got punk!"

Kenpachi came behind the red haired male and grabbed the boy's collar, spinning him out of Renji's considerably easier hold. "You," he growled in the poor boy's face who could barely keep himself from shitting his pants. "Do you fight?"

"I-I-I h-have b-b-been t-t-t-taught n-n-n-not t-to!" Even Cana was surprised by how bad he stuttered.

Kenpachi dropped the boy on the ground, where he fell in a pile of misplaced limbs. Everybody glared at his bent head, somehow wanting to gauze his reaction out of his motionlessness. Kaname did not stir an inch. Finally Ikkaku stepped forward. "Look up!" He barked in the boy's face. The little bob head of brown locks lifted up to reveal a terrified face. "You piece of shit," The 'shaven' Shinigami muttered darkly. "Do you think I am bald?"

"Y-yes sir."

The now-Shinigami-turned-mad-bull male pounced at him and held him up by the neck. "How dare you?" His eyes glowed as he questioned the boy meanwhile Kaname was sure he had somehow entered an Anime world, for only there could such men exist.

Byakuya meanwhile moved to stand beside the stunned girl. "Let us go home while they deal with this infidel, Cana." His face as usual betrayed no expression but his aura was so dark and menacing the usually dauntless girl cringed back.

Cana was utterly surprised by her boyfriend's response when he saw how she reacted to her 'uncle'. He seemed to have acquired courage out of nowhere. His eyebrows furrowed as he glared back at the bald male. "Who in hell did you just call piece of shit?! And you don't have hair so that's bald and that is just what I said. If you plan on not growing hair, fucking deal with it! Plus, who gave you the right to come and ruin my first date?! Get the flying fuck away from here!"

Ikkaku was so surprised he dropped the boy, who managed to land on his feet. He scowled at the rest of them. "I finally gain the courage to ask the-best-freaking-girl-in-the-whole-freaking-world out and just when I am trying to impress her you freaking band of gay imbeciles appear out of nowhere and make me make a fool out of myself by proving to her that I am a coward, which, just so you know, I am not! It was just up to me till now but let me get this straight, YOU AIN'T GONNA BE TAKING CANA ANYWHERE! Her mother assigned me with her responsibility and even if she hadn't I won't let her go anywhere in hell with you, uncles or not!"

Everyone stared at the boy, speechless for a moment. "Look who is talking." Urahara smirked his trademark smirk. Renji advanced on the boy his eyes being consumed in shadows. His wild possessiveness of her reminded him of himself and Rukia, and then Ichigo and Rukia, and how he was there for her when Renji was shying away. He couldn't seem to bear it. "You bastard, do you even know who you gotta be to talk back to us?"

Before Kaname could respond, a hard kick landed on the side of Renji's head. "I so knew something was going on here!" Rukia screamed as she landed on top of her fallen best friend's head. In one hand she held Ichigo's ear, and in the other Hide's, who in turn held Toushiro's and Isshin's, who in turn held Uryuu's and Chad's, so that they made a whole chain while Kiyo clung to her chest along with Kon who stuck their tongues out at the strawberry. Karin, Yuzu, Inoue and Tatsuki followed. Cana immediately realized her mother must have needed help with immobilizing some of the men.

"What the hell do ya guys think of yourselves?!" Rukia barked, shark teeth appearing. "You can't ruin my daughter's date!"

"Um, Kaname, that is my mom, Rukia. The guy with the orange hair like mine is my dad, Ichigo and you already know my brother Hide. Oh and yeah, the one who is clinging to mum's chest is also a younger brother called Kiyo. The white-haired guy my dad holds the ear of is Toushiro, my Aunt Karin's boyfriend. By the way that is the girl with the short straight dark hair right there. The guy whom Hide has a hold on is my grandpa Isshin. The dark haired, spectacled dude is called Uryuu Ishida, and he makes the best dresses ever! And the last one is uncle Chand. The brunette with the pleasant smile and the big you-know-what-since-you-are-male is Inoue aunty and she is engaged to Uryuu. The one with the wild black hair is Aunt Tatsuki and she is way more dangerous than any of my uncles. And the last one is Aunt Yuzu. She, along with Karin aunty are dad's siblings."

"I see. Nice to meet you all."

Rukia smiled politely (which is first, admit it). "It was nice to meet you as well though I am damn sure these sick men out here irritated the fuck out of you. You see, Cana is the only female child so they tend to grow incredibly possessive. Sorry."

"I don't say I understand, but it is okay. Do I have your permission to date Cana?"

"Aww, you are so polite, unlike this guy out here," She poked the silent-up-till-now-cause-he-finally-decided-he-wanted-to-remain-alive Ichigo. "His proposal stank!"

"Thank you so much." Kaname bowed.

"Say Kan-chan, would you want to go somewhere quieter?"

"Kan-chan?"

"Kaname is too long!" She pouted. The boy just blushed and patted her head as she led them off to wherever she had in mind.

"Kaname." Byakuya's chilly voice made him drop dead in his tracks. "You dare take my niece to somewhere cheap," He turned his face to edge in a sideways glare. "And I shall take it upon my honor to end you."

Kaname shuddered but Cana just pulled him away.

"Who ever told her of our plans?!" Ichigo screamed, only to be met with silence and puzzled glares. Rukia just smirked while her girly friends giggled and her tomboyish friends allowed a small smile to leak through.

"Ichogo, you are not the only one with friends in Soul Society." They all turned to find Rangiku and Hinamori walking towards them, clad in revealing human clothes which immediately had Hisagi and Kira nose bleeding. Following them were Nanao, Nemu, Yachiru and Isane all looking stunningly hot in their human clothing. Last to come was Yoruichi, who needless to say, came and smacked urahara so hard he was unconscious and over her shoulder in a second.

Now that the guys had already caused such a hell lot of ruckus, all eyes were drawn to their table, which, just for record, had been upturned by someone, as the females advanced. All the males present in the restaurant had found a female up to them. Rangiku and Inoue suddenly had many followers, and ogle-rs, while Uryuu could barely keep himself from shooting all of them down. Yoruichi for one just smirked as she started at the Quincy.

"It was so easy to get your plans out of Kira-kun. Sex works better for him than even alcohol." Hinamori smiled sweetly while said man rushed to put a hand on her mouth. Too late now, the beast and the beauty (referring to Ikkaku and Yumichika here) already had enough ammunition to tease him the fuck out of his mind now.

Everyone laughed except for Kenpachi, who was sword-picking his nails. (don't ask me what happened to the gigai -_-) Byakuya (need I even mention that?) and Toushiro.

"Renji." Byakuya's deep rich voice extracted his lieutenant's attention from his sister. "I believe your paperwork is still due."

"Yes, taichou." The red haired male sighed making everyone but the lieutenants laugh hard, for only they understood his pain. "I don't see why I sleep with you, when you still won't excuse me from that shit." He muttered under his breath making Rukia's eyes widen, but thankfully, she was the only one who heard.

"Or maybe, the Captain just wanna go and _sleep?"_ The cat woman teased her former student/play toy. He turned to glare at her, but then thought better of it and ignored her which totally pissed her off, serving the right purpose for the stoic male.

"Do you know what it feels like now, to have your sister, or in your case, daughter just come up to you one day and announce she is pregnant?" The aforementioned Captain glared at Ichigo who just sweat dropped.

"Um, Byakuya she isn't pregnant yet."

"Will be soon if she continues living with your kind. As for you Rukia, if you somehow kill him accidentally one day, I promise I will see things through with the Soul Society." With that he turned and left Renji close by, with Rukia fangirling, Ichigo seething, Isshin weeping and laughing simultaneously, and everyone else laughing.

Soon all the Soul Reapers had returned to Soul Society, along with Toushiro. Apparently, Rangiku had neglected her work for drinking and shopping again. As the freaky gang of spouses, and fiancées, and kids, and fathers, and mothers, and sisters, and the exceptional single walked down the streets, after a huge tirade of scolding from the hotel manager which the real culprits weren't there to bear (thankfully, or else who knew what could have happened to the manager O.O) Ichigo remembered the time when he had had to fight his closest friends all to protect the girl he loved. Though he had not known then. He had not known anything. Nobody had.

Destiny sure had a twisted sense of humor.

 **Congratulations! You survived through a heck lot of torture!**

 **I so know this is incredibly boring. Please forgive me. I will try to do better next time. Please don't abandon the story. I will update! As soon as I can think of something. Please? I love you all.**  
 **Also, if I still haven't thought of anything next time, the next chapter will be IchiRuki's letter to Byakuya regarding…..**  
 **Hehe I love you guys!**

 **And guys, the 'poll' about the ending is still on.**

 **P.S. all the 'Guests' please leave me a name so I can respond to you properly. But as of now, you will just have to guess which answer is yours.**

 **yaoigirl2000: First of all, your username is amusing XD. I am glad you like ByaRuki cause I like it too. Just as much as I like IchiRuki and RenRuki (I know I am mad lol) But I think IchiRuki is weighing out. And there are next to no RenRuki demands? Honestly?! *cries along with Renji* But lets see. I won't disappoint any of my precious readers ;)**

 **Zitag: Many more do. If the poll goes the way it is going, I am sure you will get what you want. How did you like this chapter anyway? I paired Ichigo and Rukia just for you and all the other fans of the duo.**

 **JoTerry: You can bet even I l(ed)mao during that. XD I know... Inoue cussing is like... but that was the point. To show the hidden side of her that is not so s** _ **weet**_ **and** _ **cute.**_ **(Yes I see her as a villain for IchiRuki) And yes, I have a path set out. It might seem cliche in the beginning but I promise you it~is~not. Yes, I sang that out.**

 **Guest:** _ **I am highly obliged to find such a faithful reader**_ **XD Up till two in the morn? You are bae! Yes, I am feeling hyper today but... whatever. Thank you. I rushed through this update for you. Have fun waking up till two again ;)**

 **Guest: Really?! You think it was the best?! Thanks :) Damn, I come close to crying too whenever I think of what I am putting my own favorite character through. Its like... Idek. The next chapters are going to even more sentimental. But she will have a happy ending. Maybe? XD**

 **Guest: Lolllll (I am going to be trying to use your technique to convey my excitement as well) I am glad you like it. You made me laugh really.**

 **Guest: Idek why I keep repeating this but it looks like it will definitely be an IchiRuki, unless I can think of some way to ya know... no, you don't... even I don't. *sweatdrops***


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey everybody I am back! I have finally decided how the story would proceed so the IchiRuki letter would have to wait. Sorry to all those who messaged me especially regarding that. But I will publish it. And guys honestly, still no RenRuki ships?! Have you lost it?! I love the pairing. And alright this may seem cliche but trust me it is not. Have patience. It will be worth it. And all my dearest ByaRuki supporters, don't get depressed by the upcoming chapters! I promise you I will not disappoint anyone. Alright, here we go. Do tell me how you liked it!**

Ukitake's POV

The door slid back to reveal Unohana taichou's worried face. I was right. There was something wrong with Rukia and she hadn't bothered telling anyone anything about it. She was regular as always but with every passing day in this past month she had been growing paler and paler. She looked in need of sleep. But that wasn't it. It could have been normal stress or tiredness, the problem arose when I was informed of her constant throwing up and when she fainted at random intervals for no reason, even after practically snarfing down lunch.

When I asked her about it she dismissed it as a 'girl problem'. Of course, I couldn't have asked her anything else after that. But when she didn't seem to be getting better anytime soon, I had to ask Byakuya about whether she was eating properly at home or not, and about her sleeping routines. To my immense surprise, I found out that she had been avoiding being in his presence for the last month. She would ask for her meals to be served in her room and avoid all but the most necessary contact with him. He said he paid no mind to it, but after so many years with him I had learnt to read his unexpressed emotions off him. The anxiety that was lost on his outer demeanor was pretty obvious to me and there was a considerate amount of what I can only call discomfort when he mentioned how less he had seen of her. He was concerned about his sister. But of course, nothing could be taken granted for Kuchiki Byakuya.

I had managed to convince him to leave the matter alone for the time being, and convinced her to come on a visit to Unohana taichou with me. From then onwards, it was her job to compel the petite Shinigami to undergo a health check up, which needless to say, she managed very well.

I stood up as said woman advanced towards me. Her forehead was crinkled and her mouth drawn in a thin line. "Do you know of any romantic relationship she might be in?", she questioned without bothering with trivial conversation.

"I won't. But it is highly possible she is involved with either Kurosaki-kun or Abarai-kun. Why do you ask?"

"Ukitake, Rukia is pregnant."

Rukia's POV

I waited patiently as I lay on the comfortable bed in the check up ward of Squad 4 (that is Unohana's Squad, right? If not, I apologize). It had been half an hour since Unohana taichou left and I had absolutely nothing to do but think, and that was just what I had been telling myself to not do for so long.

It had been a whole month. I had had just about no connection to the Human World all this while. I even refused a mission, which left Ukitake taichou wondering just what in hell was wrong with me. How I wished I could have told him. How I wished I could have told anyone. But I couldn't.

It haunted my dreams every night, the thought that it was _him._ But at the same time I knew it wasn't Ichigo. I had no idea what the punishment was in Soul Society for rape but I couldn't get him punished for something he didn't do with his own accord. No, not him, not the one who risked his life for my sake, not the one who sparked life back into me. No, definitely not him.

I tried to say the word out loud. Rape. It still feels so foreign, like it was never meant for me.

I sighed. I had been acting incredibly suspicious these days. I hadn't had a single meal with Nii-sama after Renji left that night. I had asked my servants to bring my meals into my room. I woke up and left for work earlier than he did. I came home late so I did not have to see him, taking up extra work that was not in my stack. I had sensed him pass from in front of my room and stop briefly, only to leave. Of course, after how I pushed him away that day, he won't come back to see me.

I had been spending all my time jacked up in work. I didn't have an intelligent word to spare anyone. I was being grouchy to everybody and I won't bother smiling. I hadn't seen one smiling face except that of my Captain for three straight weeks.

Renji had been keeping busy these days. He always had some mission to go to or some pile to finish off whenever I went to him. He would shoo me off. It reminded me of our days in the Academy and the split in our friendship. I sighed. Maybe I hadn't really gotten him back. We were lost the day we entered the cursed place.

For a brief second, I let my mind wander off to a different side of this story. What would have happened had we entered the Academy in the first place? We could have grown up together, maybe even raised a family. Who knew what future would have had in store for us were that the case?

I gulped down the next of my thoughts as I heard the door open. Ukitake taichou walked in with a serious looking Unohana taichou behind him. The older woman secured the door behind them. I tried to sit up only to be motioned for by him to lay right back down. I sat up nevertheless. It never ceased to give me a better feeling about myself. I didn't really like lying down anymore.

"Kuchiki-san,", the kind looking woman began but stopped when Ukitake taichou raised a hand. I had never ever seen such a look on his face before. His eyes pierced through me, as if they could see a whole new layer of me. His jaw was set hard and his frown never ceased to exist. Being used to his warm smile alone, there was no way I could take this well.

"Are you in some kind of a relationship with anyone Rukia?"

His question surprised me. But the way his brown eyes beheld mine, they somehow managed to calm my boiling insides. I took a deep breath as I contemplated the question, wondering exactly why he would ask that. Well, was I? "No.", I said.

He took in a deep breath and even though his frown got bigger, his face wasn't set in a calculating mask anymore. He gave me a helpless look. "Just what have you gotten yourself into this time, child?"

I had no idea what he was talking about. True, trouble seemed to be following me around but I had no idea what I had done now.

"Kuchiki-san…" Unohana taichou began.

"Rukia please. And kindly forgive my interruption."

She smiled warmly. "Alright, Rukia, but if it is so, I want to ask you to put aside all formalities for now as well."

I nodded.

"Now there, Rukia, what I am about to ask might seem rather personal but since I haven't seen many of those, I need your confirmation that your case is actually what I assume. It appears so, Rukia, that you are pregnant. Have you had any intercourse with just about anyone, for I would have to inform that person of your condition?"

My eyes widened as I waited for the words to sink in. Just what… I could feel things sink out and I knew my face was losing color. My eyeballs danced about over my cornea as I tried to make sense of what she just said. I was what? I couldn't believe my ears. Wasn't it supposed to be something incredibly difficult?

Raked my brain for possible explanations for what I had been going through. I came up with none. My sickness suddenly made sense. All the vomiting, the drowsiness, the fainting, the growing hunger, the weakness.

I felt my eyes tear up. Just about why? Why me? I was at a loss for words. I heard someone call out for me and that was what broke my reverie. I blinked the tears away as I battled images after images. All the very same… no! I won't let my shields that I had taken a whole month to draw up to protect myself from the reality crumble away now. I laid a hand on my stomach. Why was it so easy to believe there was life brimming there?

It was unexpected and surprised me, but it didn't rattle me half as much as one would think. I could believe it. Hell yes, I could. I felt a smile leak through out of nowhere. Jeez, what the hell was happening?

"Rukia?", Ukitake taichou questioned.

"Yes. It is…" I stopped as I realized I couldn't tell them who the father was. No way could I do that without revealing what had actually happened. I had no idea how I should be reacting in the first place.

"It is?"

"I cannot tell you."

"I am sorry to hear that. Then I would expect you will inform him of the same yourself?"

I hesitated. Could I? No, that was beyond the point. The thing was, did I want to? I could raise the child alone. I didn't need his help. He would never have to know.

"Whoever he is, has a right to know as well, Rukia. And we are here to inform him in case you are feeling uncomfortable."

"It is Ichigo. Will you please tell him?"

Captain nodded and I breathed a sigh of relief but the moment wasn't to last long.

"And what about Byakuya? Do you want me to speak to him as well?"

Oh shit.

Till this point I hadn't even considered my brother, who clearly won't be impressed by this news, no matter how you look at it. I couldn't face him with it. After all that he had said, this would be an act of betrayal. Hell, I should have rejected him when I had the chance.

But the thing was, every time I thought of it, a dull ache entered my chest. I did not want to and I had no idea why.

Hell, I hadn't considered anything. Nii-sama, Renji, the Elders, Soul Society, my life as a Soul Reaper. I hadn't figured anything out. Panic smote me. What the hell? What the hell? What the hell?

I couldn't tell Nii-sama. No way. I let my mask crumble apart as worry gripped the skin on my forehead into a tight frown. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

I was aware that a nervous breakdown was on my way. The information Unohana taichou gave did not help. "Rukia, Soul Reaper pregnancies are way different than normal human ones. It is highly complicated and unstable. You are going to need all your strength to survive this. All difficult tasks are off limit from now on. There will no fighting, not even jumping around. You will eat healthy food and steer off alcohol. You will be in bed for half the day, while the rest will be spent near it. The fetus in you is most likely to start growing at an alarming rate from now on. After precisely six months from this date, it will be born, I am guessing, if all goes well. Till that time it will continue to weaken you beyond your own imagination. Any excess stress can kill both of you. This is a very delicate matter. That is, unless you choose to abort it."

Abort it?!

"No!" Even through the panic attack, the answer came almost immediately. I had a hell lot to worry about and too many obstacles, but none of them were reason enough to end a life. I had been blessed with the best of fortune, as some people would say. I won't be a bitch and kill my own child. No, no way in hell itself could I ever do that.

"Very well. Then you will have to be extremely careful from now on. Even exposure to high level reaitsu is forbidden, so your brother had to be informed."

 _Had_ to be informed?

My eyes opened in dread as I felt an incredibly familiar reaitsu snake into the room right before I fainted.

*TIME SKIP*

I opened my eyes right to his back, as he sat doing what he normally did late at night, paperwork. It was annoying how he could carry stacks of it from his office to his library and still have some left to bring back to his room at night. But he had told me one day how he did that to relieve that damned red-haired monkey, and yes, he had a heart that felt for others as well.

"Rukia."

His voice was enough to send me zooming back into reality, and memories crashed down on me. Oh man, my lower lip wobbled, how was I going to deal with this?

I tried to sit up, and realized I had been sleeping in his futon. My head was pounding for some strange reason but I managed to fold my legs carefully beneath me. He did not turn towards me and though I was sick of having to talk to his back instead of him, that relieved me.

"Why didn't you tell me straight away?"

A shudder ran down my back. "It is not how it seems to be…" I let my voice drift off. Strangely, I still wasn't willing to tell him.

"Don't give me such lame excuses. Why would you keep me waiting, if this was how it would end?"

I felt tears drip down my cheeks. I tried to speak but failed. I had nothing to say. All I could do for now was wonder how I ended up this way. Just, why? What had I wanted out of us was unknown to me, but it wasn't this.

"Don't make me repeat myself. Why is all I ask, then you may leave."

I remained silent. There was nothing to say. Silence raged in my ears and banged on my head, but I did not want to break it. My brain kept chanting a Kido spell, the only way for me to concentrate, but I did not focus my energy in anything in particular, lest I released it. I relished in the familiar cadence of the words. The spell was the only thing I now had any control left on.

That was when the literal explanation for it hit me. I was silent because my whole world had collapsed as easily as a card palace.

I had nothing left.

"I should have realized how it would end. I was being a fool. But at least you could have told me what was on your mind. I never forced you. Did you like toying with me? As punishment for how I behaved earlier probably? You are…" his sentence dissolved into silence as I contemplated what was about to come. What was I? A slut to Ichigo, what to him?

"My affections have been misplaced in you. I am ashamed of your deeds. You should not have soiled the family's name."

I felt myself break. The family's name?! Was that all that mattered?! Was that the extent of his love and trust?! Why didn't he bother asking me for what had actually happened even once?! How could he…

"You shall be appropriately punished for this shameless act of yours before you are wedded off to that ryoka…"

"That is all that really matters, right?"

He paused. "What do you mean?"

"What if this was not what I wanted?"

"Stop blaming your deeds on others, Rukia. How could it be that this was not what you wanted? Stop being so dishonorable and face what you have done with courage. What you loose from now on, is going to be your fault and no one else's." He turned his face slightly, so that I could catch a glimpse of his cold gray eye. "This is all your fault."

I raised one hand to wipe the tears away from my face. I deliberated my movements to be calm and lucid, practiced like his were, meant to annoy him more. I looked up at him and saw that he had turned his back on me again. I raised my head. Tears burned in the back of my throat. I would not, could not let them out.

"I would like to thank you for your unsuccessful evaluation of how honorable I am, Byakuya Nii-sama. At least, you spared a second to form an opinion. I am truly grateful, let me however tell you, that you are wrong. I am going to get through the punishment and then marry that strawberry like you want, I will follow what you say, like always. What you need to know is, your 'affections' were not misplaced, though my belief that they were true was."

I was out of the room before he could get another word in.

*TIME SKIP*

The wind whipped my uniform against my body. It gave me a sense of exactly how weak I was. How I could never have survived without others' help. First Renji's, then Nii-sama's, then Kaien-dono's, then Ukitake taichou's, and finally Ichigo's. I was a failure.

Tears stung my eyes but I was not willing to let them out as my eyes grazed the rough haven below. The rocks in the pit were jagged, they made me want to hug the cliff, but I had to come to embrace them. And I was not going to die with tears all over me. No way.

I heard a swish behind me, but did not care to turn as I tipped, feeling the ground come up to swallow me.

An arm grabbed my waist, yanking me back. I gasped as air shot out from along me, reminding me of the plummet I was about to make. I was now backed up against a firm chest, and a hand that held me in place with seemingly, no effort. Without further thought, I began to struggle against whoever had saved me. I wiggled and the intruder had to put one more arm around my waist in order to steady me. I tried to shoulder my way away from the person but s/he was too strong for me. I leaned down and bit hard on the person's arm. I heard a hiss but the pressure did not loosen, however the person turned me to face who I figured out was the Head Captain.

My eyes widened as I flew further into panic. I clawed at his chest to no avail. I wiggled and slammed hard on his side but I had almost no effect on him. I tried to remove my hands which were pinned to my sides by his arm that went around my waist.

He removed one arm to land a hard slap across my face as he grunted roughly. It jarred the side of my face.

But it also sent realization racing to me. I looked back at the edge of the cliff, and down at my stomach. What was I about to do?

Seeing I had subdued, he released me. My knees were too weak to support me though, and I fell onto the muddy ground. As if on cue, thunder roared above us, and rain drops began to cascade around me. I was infinitely glad. They would hide my tears.

He just stood there for a few minutes, watching me as I cried. His reaitsu flared around us. As curious as I was as to his appearance here, I dared not ask him why he was here. His presence scared me. He was too powerful and I didn't seem to have an affinity for powerful males.

After about fifteen minutes, he asked me, "What were you about to do just now, Kuchiki? As much as that Kurosaki had risked for you and you would waste all that? And seeing as how you are pregnant, what were you thinking?" His voice was rough and low and sent shudders through me. Of course, he knew I was pregnant. I was positive he could sense the double aura. I leaned my head back to gaze into his age-wizened face. The Head Captain had just saved me from committing suicide. Just how bad could it get?

"I…" I told him all that had happened. I picked up the story from scratch and narrated everything. He did not interrupt, and listened. His eyes grazed my face but they had lost that roughness. He nodded once I had finished my narration.

"You landed in some deep trouble this time, didn't you Kuchiki?"

"You mean, deeper than being under the threat of execution?" I couldn't help biting at him. He snorted again, all in good humor this time. He said nothing and just gazed at my face, like he could read volumes off of me. I stared back, having nothing to do or say. Looking at him did not make me hesitate, like looking at my brother usually did. It was easier, somehow.

"You didn't even try to explain it to him." I was confused as to whether it was a question or a statement. Either way, it made me laugh harshly. I was amazed by how much easier it was to be rash around him. It was easy to gaze into his eyes and register the length of his now-dripping-with-rainwater beard, that somehow left the impression that it was showcasing his strength and still stand my ground. To be able to rebel and express discontent. It took me a moment to realize why that was so, because he was open to views. He might be insanely strong and all, but he was nowhere next to condescending.

"How would it help? How would it undo what has already happened? I don't see no reason to… and even if I did, he won't care to pay me an ear."

He just sighed and motioned at me to stand up. I did and he turned away, starting to walk, "I will be taking you back to your house. You may do as you please from then onwards, it is your choice." The decision did not startle me and I did not protest. What else was I expecting? I would have had to go back, and I knew it.

My steps were weighed down by my soaked uniform and mud clung to my slippers. I wondered if it had rained earlier recently, cause I hadn't been paying attention.

We reached the gates in no time, which the servants held open for us. One of them escorted us inside and the Head Captain requested for me to be whisked away while he spoke to my brother. That is all I really remember of the night, before well deserved sleep engulfed me in one of those lonely corridors of my cage.

 **sw8Rukia: Thank you! I am half way through reading your works and lol you are a big fan of angst XD. Well twinsyy fist! Anyways, emotions have always been a weak point in my narration. That was a reason I started on this fic, to strengthen my hold on the emotionality. And what better way than to experiment on pre-defined characters who are already set in their own feel-frame? To be able to shatter that and make it believable was the biggest challenge. Lol I am an extremist and I know that. Well, I am glad you like it. Now I can finally get back to my novels *sigh***

 **Guest: I know right! This pairing is all drama and fun and no shitty fluff at all. I love it! One of the reasons I ship it! Though to be honest, my favorite is RukiaxChappy lol.**

 **JoTerry: Nice to see that really. Rukia is amazing! It is hard to not like her. Are there any ShuuRuki fics around? I never knew. I will search for them just now. Really I love how you are a constant reviewer. I always look forward to what you would have to say. Like I said, I love RenRuki. Initially, I was not that supportive of it but after that brief look into their history and the way Rukia's face lit up when she saw Renji running towards her at the execution... even Ichigo couldn't do that. It made me start reading RenRuki and that was what set me to it. I whole heartedly ship it. Though, tbh, I can relate to the best friends/lovers arc which is one of the main reasons behind me supporting this one. Ichigo and Renji can not be compared according to me. Maybe you should try to read some RenRuki yourself. It is nice take my word for it. But I hate how most of the fics deal with sex. I mean, what? There is way more to that couple than vain physical needs and a giant dick!**


	10. Chapter 10

**_Hello!_** **How are you folks? I am fine here. Grounded and in the middle of exams but fine nevertheless. This time I am positively positive though that this is not going to end soon or easily. This time I really screwed up and don't even ask me how. Just one stupid dare and there goes my dongle and Quotev. Ugh! Alright on with the chapter!**

Rukia's POV

I don't know what woke me up. Maybe the faint thrumming in my head, or the recurrent nightmares, or just about nothing in particular, I had no idea. The first thing I noticed was how I was back in my room. Somebody must have shifted me here. Who, the servants? I snorted. Who else? I tried to sit up only to feel a sharp sting in my butt. I hissed and hunched up but had to fall right down on my knees when the pit at the bottom of my stomach erupted in fire. I twisted my way out of the sheets somehow and sat back.

His sight was misplaced here, just like his affections were misplaced in me.

His face was drawn in his usual emotionless mask. His cold eyes swept over my futon disapprovingly. "The inconvenience just now should not have been here. I shall get it rectified…"

"Shut up. Just shut up. I need just a bit more than a needle less mattress Kuchiki taichou and you can never provide that." I was anything but sorry, though a twinge of guilt uncurled inside me when I saw his head cock back, as if stung. Maybe, just maybe, if he showed more of his emotions, people would bother remembering that he could be hurt.

He hesitated. "Why didn't you tell me?"

His stress was not on why _I_ didn't tell him, rather it was on why didn't I tell _him._ There was a big difference between the two, which was so easy to ignore…

"How many opportunities did you provide me with?"

" _You_ were the one who had been avoiding me."

Somehow, his fake indifference spiked my temper. "Would you please stop acting like all this bores the hell out of you?! Please?!"

His eyes widened a bit and I saw him struggle with an appropriate expression. I remembered how in one of my immature fantasies I thought he had just forgotten how to display expressions and now no matter how he wanted to he couldn't, so it might just be that I mattered to him but he just couldn't show it.

It was miraculous how that was partially true and partially over estimated, and that hurt.

Finally he settled for a stoic mask as always. "I thought, after everything, now you would be someone who couldn't be fooled by my mask."

I, for once, regretted snapping at my brother, adoptive or whatever. It was just so surprising how everyone was so difficult for me to read. I would rather starve than live a life the likes of his, in this palace. This was not where I belonged. I was an insect from the streets of the roughest districts of Soul Society. That. Is. It.

I leaned away from where he was perched. Right at the threshold like he was preparing to jump out. I gazed at him steadily. His eyes revealed nothing. Nothing, at all. Wouldn't it be easier were that just how it was?

"I am sorry, but I am not. Not after what happened tonight. I don't think you have anymore to yourself than your deaf pride that refuses to listen or the family name that is now soiled because of me. Believe me Nii-sama, I am."

"I am sorry if that is so. What do you wish to do from now on? I would abide with whatever you say."

It was at that precise moment that I realized how whatever we had worked up in this past month and a half had been destroyed by that small speech of mine. I had pushed him further away than he ever was. I had just severed any weird travesty of any kind of relation that we could have built. And yes, I was sorry. Sorry for him and for myself. Sorry for so many people all of a sudden that I was obliged to cry again.

I could try to salvage it. Backtrack and tell him how I never meant that, but some threads just couldn't be reattached. Once destroyed they would remain gone forever. Ours was one such thread. I won't lie and tell him I wasn't mad at him, nor could I force myself to believe either of us had actually known what to do and acted how we did upon deliberation. There was no turning back. We were gone.

"Do as you please. I am used to having everything foretold in my life anyway." I expected him to protest or probably lecture me about taking responsibility, but all he did was nod. It surprised me. Was it that easy for him to decide my life for me? Not entirely his fault though.

"About Kurosaki, I wish to punish him…"

"No!" The word was out before I fully contemplated what he meant. I watched his mask crumble, and he grimaced as if stung. It struck me that my protectiveness of my offender made his heart hurt. To me, he was more important than life itself. I would let someone else decide the course of my life however, I won't let anybody scratch that Kurosaki boy. I grimaced as well.

"As you wish." He stood up and so did I. It was a habit and it didn't look like it would leave anytime soon. Against my better will, my legs carried me foreword till I was standing in front of him, blocking him from my door, which he had opened already. He stopped when he saw me, allowing his eyes to graze my jaw. He skirted my eyes though. He started leaning down and placing his arms around my frail waist, touched his warm lips to my damp forehead. He remained there for about five minutes. Finally, he whispered against my skin. "I am sorry, Rukia."

"So am I, Byakuya." The words just slipped out and felt so right. Calling him by his name instead of elder brother, Captain or whatever was easier as well.

He straightened, and without casting one backward glance, swept out. He slid the door behind himself and I couldn't help but think it symbolized the walls between us, closed doors and shuttered windows. That was all that was left of us now.

Through the thin material of the rice door, I heard him whisper the very same phrase as me at the very same moment. It was surprising how close our thoughts had came to uniting, as if we were one mind instead of two, separated by a door that could be opened anytime soon. Only it was not so.

"I am sorry Hisana."

I could not decide whether the letter I received right in the morning made me feel better or worse, but I guessed that was all there would be to it. Now there was no backtracking. Officially so.

 _Rukia,_  
 _I am perfectly aware of how receiving this letter early in the morning won't be on the top of your list of priorities but there are things that need to be conveyed. You gave me permission yesterday to decide your fate for you, and I have complied. I think it will be in your best interests, if you stayed away from any laborious work from now on, whatever that might be, so your wedding will be closed off with only a few friends, with absolutely no pomp and show so that you may not be wearied out._

My eyes widened at that. Did he really want to…? No. I frowned. I would not let myself be cheated now. I could almost hear the snickers of the Elders when they won over him, as he tried to resist my wedding. I sighed. Those lines about me not being worn out by the wedding and all were just covers they were using to conceal their original intentions, which was to let no one know of my condition. He had thinly wrapped it because he wanted me to know. He wanted me to know this was not his decision.

 _You wedding will be in a week from now, in the human world._

I smiled at that. There, people might as well enjoy it.

 _As is obvious, you will go to live with the Kurosaki from then onwards. You are not being exiled from Soul Society but I have seen to it that you have to have no connection with anybody here. You are always welcome, but your status in the Thirteen Court Guard Squads, is hereby taken to never be returned. You cannot use your sword though, in the human world, whereas you may retain your powers._

I could not believe this. So I was no one to them from now on. My thoughts whizzed back to my life in my Squad. To the friendly smile of my Captain, to the scrabble of those two idiots, and most importantly to the memories of Kaien dono, that seemed to have been scribbled on the walls of the place. I suddenly felt woozy. Just what all had I lost?

 _The guest list has been finalized. If you wish to see it you can come to my office, and I will show it to you. Though, alterations will take a bit to be considered._  
 _If there is anything you object to you can always discuss it in the presence of the Elders._  
 _Kuchiki Byakuya._

I felt a deep throb in my heart. Was it that easy for him to discard me? Did he really want this? Tears stung my eyes. He was just going to marry me off, while I was this… ruined? He was going to tear my life apart. Was this how it would end? Why the hell did so many people risk their lives for me if this was how it would end?

I leaned against the wall and stifled a sob. Why was it so hard to accept this?

I turned the envelope over in my hand to put it away. I smoothed the sheet. It laid a life time imprisonment sentence for me, but I treasured it. Hell yes, I did. A tear rolled down my cheek as my fingers ran over a deep impression in the velum sheet. I squinted at it, to find the insignia of the Kuchiki clan. I scowled as it all fell in place.

The letter was written by my brother, but sent to me only once the Elders approved of it. It was them working through him. It was them.

It was me.

*TIME SKIP*

I looked down at the envelope he slipped me as he crossed me. The dinner had gone by in much familiar silence. My heart hurt to see his strangely dignified yet threatening movements. He was so strong but even he could not alter the decisions of the Elders. He had sworn to never break rules again, and I honestly did not believe I was important enough.

His face was set in his perfect emotionless mask. It was painful that he did not even acknowledge my presence. Even the servants seemed to have noticed how the weird strangled tension that had been forsaken between us had returned full force.

So when I registered the feeling of the smooth sheet in my hand, I frowned and stopped right there. It was only his retreating figure that made me jolt out of my reverie and move. I would not want anybody to discover this one letter.

I closed the door of my room firmly behind me. My room felt safe and closed off, sheltered from the beasts of this house. I sat down on my bed and unfolded the letter with a thudding heart.

 _Dear Rukia,_  
 _First of all, I would like to apologize for my cold addressing in the previous letter. As you might have guessed, I was the one writing it, yet really wasn't expressing how I felt. It was the Elders. I cannot override their decisions. I had sworn on my parents' grave that I will not break any rules. That which they accuse you of, that is sleeping with a man before marriage, is punishable by an outcasting. I received some compensation in your case after a debate of five continuous hours. I have no idea, how to react to this. I am perfectly aware of how this might hurt you and I am sorry._  
 _I know we reached a strange understanding yesterday. I did not wish to severe it but there are things I need to tell you, things I couldn't have, had I been in front of you. I am afraid I would say things I do not mean. I just want to let you know, that you are precious. And you aren't scarred. You are as pure and perfect as ever. I still love you, Rukia._  
 _I don't want to let you go. I want to lock you up in a safe vault and keep you away from everyone's eyes. But I am afraid I can't and it is not just about the rules, it is about how I know you won't want to be restrained. You have grown on the streets, and you carry the energy and spirit from there to these desolate walls. You don't belong here but you don't belong there either. I am afraid I can never give you what you deserve. I love you Rukia, but you are not mine to keep._  
 _The marriage was uncalled for. It was unneeded. I have no idea, whether you approve of it, or disapprove, but it would hurt me either way._  
 _There are things in life that we are destined to achieve, others that we have to work for, and the last group, the one where it is just impossible to have them, yet they are what we crave for. And the emptiness their absence leaves hurts so much. I do not know how you feel about me, neither do I wish or deserve to. I am sorry and thankful at the same time. I have failed Hisana, I could not keep you safe. You were happier with that lieutenant of mine and I know that. You are that treasure that I, in all my selfish fantasies, have every right to claim, but have long lost the key to._  
 _I am sorry. This was never what I wanted. I don't know how this will turn out in the end, but however that happens, I wish you a happy life ahead._  
 _And yes, please don't let it break you. Remain the same, remain you, remain mine._  
 _Byakuya._

I did not feel like crying.

My response surprised me. I did not feel any kind of negative emotions. If anything, the letter set me at peace. _He_ did not feel like how I thought he did, and that was all that mattered.

I stood up mechanically. My legs were under no control my brain could enforce as I walked out of the room and towards the west wing.

I was not supposed to be here. I was reminded of the same every time I crossed a servant, but this was where I wanted to be and now that I was already impure in the eyes of the Elders, as Byakuya's last letter suggested, I might as well be proved so and it would not matter. They could not kill me.

I had a strange sense of purpose, I had never felt in this house before. I was right and I wasn't going to be deterred.

I did not bother to knock on his door and slid it open to his white clad back as he sat working. He turned and looked up, crooking one perfect eye brow at my sudden appearance. I wanted to scream at him all of a sudden for looking so perfect even at night.

I walked up to where he sat, steadily realizing that I wanted to do this. I wanted to be here all along. My subconscious had fulfilled what my conscious denied accepting and I was hellishly grateful.

"Rukia…"

"Shut up."

His eyes widened, but then he sighed with a faint smile. I remembered the night when he first admitted his affections for me. It brought a smile to my lips as well.

"I guess I should quit being surprised when you say that."

"Yeah, I got a brain that thinks quite a lot like yours and I do not like to hear stupid statements of the least importance. For instance, I know my name so I don't want to hear the surprise etched on to it. I want to be here. For one last time."

He nodded and stood up. He crossed the small distance left between us and pulled me close to his chest, his heavenly scent engulfing me completely. He lead us towards his futon where he settled comfortably before pulling me along. It felt uncomfortable doing this. I no longer belonged here. But just for this one night I was willing to forget. Forget all that had been said and done. I had had a considerably healthy day today. It was easy to forget the fetus in my stomach. I let myself believe it did not exist. It did not have to. I was selfish.

My body curled perfectly next to his. For the first time, I was glad I was so small. I leaned into the hollow of his neck. I was suddenly so tired.

Sleep didn't take moments to come.

 **How was that.?. please comment. I love you**

 **Guest: '** The bomb has been dropped! Dang, I didn't even see it coming ( I should have)! Holy crap you know things are serious when freakin head captain gets involved! Kyaaaa can't wait for the next chapter! _' **Well I am glad you didn't ;) HERE IS YOUR CHAPTER SAY YAY!**

 **Guest: '** I can't wait for next chapter ! please update soon' **Here ya go sweetie 3**

 **Guest: '** love this fic' **Thanks you have absolutely no idea how much that mans to me.**

 **LuciaKuchiki: Well I am glad you think so. Here is your update. Your username is interesting tbh**

 **JoTerry: Hiya! Been a while since we talked. Well I didn't get the time to look into it but I am taking your word for it, And you have no idea how excited I am for the fic you might publish. If it so happens to be, yours will be the first ShuuRuki I read.**


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